After 8 years, my son is getting his license reinstated!

Discussion in 'Substance Abuse' started by Ephchap, Sep 6, 2013.

  1. Ephchap

    Ephchap Active Member

    OMG, I was shaking when I went to the mailbox and the letter was in there. My son went to court on June 12, so almost 3 months later, the letter finally arrived (I think the postman thought I had a crush on him as I'd almost wait for him to pull up to the mailbox daily!).

    His license is being reinstated!!!! OMG, I can't tell you how happy we all are. A second chance, finally. It's a restricted license - to/from work, doctor appointments, AA meetings, plus he has to get the blow thingie in the car. We knew it would only be reinstated with those restrictions for at least the first year, but OMG! He can finally move forward with his life, and so can husband and I!!!

    I had asked back in June for good thoughts from the Board, as I know the power of this Board. For all who had sent good thoughts, rattled beads, etc., thank you from the bottom of my heart.

    For those that don't know our story, I've cut and pasted my previous post below. Wooooohooooooo. I am beyond happy! :choir:



    Old post from 3 months ago ...
    Because my difficult child is now 29, most here probably don't even know or remember me. My story with difficult child started so long ago, and after two residential stays, overcoming pot and then crack, a felony conviction while drugging at age 17, overcoming alcohol addiction, and two alcohol related driving stops (one at age 20 although under the legal alcohol limit, zero tolerance for being under age, and the second stop at age 22, and just over the legal limit), he has not had a license since age 22.

    He's the father of my 5 year old grandson, has worked at the same job for 6 years now, and has been completely sober (a member of AA and even runs the Saturday night meetings at the local Alano (AA) Club) for 3-1/2 years.

    All that background to say that he has a hearing tomorrow to appeal his license revocation. This will be his third time going back to court to ask for his license to be reinstated (with the blowing machine in the car and limited driving times to/from work and meetings). Hopefully the third time is the charm. He can now show that he's been an upstanding citizen (no trouble with police since age 22, 7 years ago), is working, and most importantly - is sober. He's done everything he can to show he's trying to move forward. The last time he couldn't prove a long enough period of sobriety; this time his 3-1/2 years is documented by his AA fellow members and signed slips. I really and truly feel it is time to let him move forward with his life (so husband and I can too, since we are driving him to/from work most of the time as there is no bus or transit system here). Last time, the judge also brought up his past substance abuse problems and said that being diagnosis'd bipolar means that he's more likely to turn to substances. Arghhh. Not sure if NAMI would agree that's legal, as making a blanket statement like that seems illegal and immoral to me, but I'm just a warrior mom who has seen my son turn things around and is trying to live a good, clean life.

    I know the power of this board, as I've been helped through some very dark times in the past with my son. I know I haven't been around much lately and so many of you don't know me, but would really and truly appreciate any good thoughts for my son tomorrow.

    Read more:
  2. FlowerGarden

    FlowerGarden Active Member

    Great news! Glad he will be able to be more independent now. You are wonderful parents that you drove him back and forth to work.
  3. Kathy813

    Kathy813 Well-Known Member Staff Member


    I'm jumping with joy!

  4. KTMom91

    KTMom91 Well-Known Member

    Great news!
  5. recoveringenabler

    recoveringenabler Well-Known Member Staff Member

    I can feel your JOY, congratulations to your son and to your family. Your son deserves this........I am very happy for all of you........
  6. Signorina

    Signorina Guest

    So happy for you both !
  7. Nancy

    Nancy Well-Known Member Staff Member

    OMG Deb that is fantastic news. I am thrilled for all of you. He is an inspiration, never gave up or felt sorry for himself. Congratulations!
  8. busywend

    busywend Well-Known Member Staff Member

  9. DDD

    DDD Well-Known Member

    It's wonderful to be able to celebrate such a big milestone within our family. I am so thrilled for him, for you and husband and all the family. Yahoo! Now the dark cloud is lifting everyone can focus on new babies and FOOTBALL! Hugs DDD
  10. Ephchap

    Ephchap Active Member

    My son has some hoops to jump through - getting a car ready, taking a written test and road test, getting the interloch breathalizer thing installed and insurance, and then will be ready to drive! It will probably take most of next week to get everything accomplished, but he's trying to line everything up as quickly as he can.

    Thank you so much. You have no idea how much the support through all these years has meant to me

  11. lovemysons

    lovemysons Well-Known Member

    Hi Deb,
    Just wanted you to know how happy I am for you all. So glad your son is getting a second chance...surely does sound like he has turned his life around and deserves it!

    Hugs and Happy dance,
  12. Sunlight

    Sunlight Active Member

    Hi ya! Just popped in here and saw this good news!! How exciting! I truly can son Ant lost his license ten years ago at age 20. (Yes Ant is 30 now!) He won't be able to even go for the bread and butter license for a few years more. When he does, he will have paid off twenty to thirty thousand in court costs and fines, retribution...and will have to get a car, have it insured and get a Breathalyzer like your son, with restricted hours of driving.

    Seems like only yesterday I taught him to drive :rolleyes: meanwhile, he makes it thru and has learned to get his own rides to and from jobs. Hey it is up to him...he has to jump thru the hoops.

    So glad your son has done so very well for so long! What a blessing! Hugs all around!
  13. Ephchap

    Ephchap Active Member

    Tammy, thanks so much. Yes, he truly has turned things around. He is the one that asked for the help 3-1/2 years ago, and he went inpatient to detox and then stayed for two weeks. After that, he found a nearby Alano Club (an AA type social place that holds AA meetings but also has social events like cards on Friday nights, football games on the tv there, golf outings and even a softball team in a league with other Alano Clubs and AA groups so it's a totally sober league) and has been going ever since. At first, he went often. He now goes once a week on Saturday evenings and is the one that sets up the club and introduces the speaker for the evening, etc. He has a very committed sponsor and they talk at least 4-5 days a week.

    Janet, thank you so much. Our boys sure put us through the wringer. OMG, between ant and my difficult child, there were entire weekends they'd be missing and we'd be online propping each other up. I don't know how we made it through those years, quite honestly. I remember ant lost his license and paid dearly in fines and time, as did my son. It's great to hear that ant is also doing better. My hope is that they have learned how precious something like driving is, and never do anything to jeopardize it again. Sigh. A mom can hope. ;)

    My son got his official restricted license today after work! He had to get the breathalyzer thing installed, take a written test, get a permit, then arrange for a parking and road test. He passed everything and picked up his license today. Tomorrow morning at 5:15 am, he will drive himself to work for the first time in 8 years!

    Thanks again for all the good thoughts and support. Truly appreciate each and every one of you.

  14. busywend

    busywend Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Deb, how much are you enjoying NOT having to drive difficult child to work everyday??????? WAHOO!!!!
  15. Nancy

    Nancy Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Deb how did his first day driving to work go? Been thinking about you all. It must have been a wonderful feeling.
  16. Ephchap

    Ephchap Active Member

    Wendy and Nancy ... in one word ... A M A Z I N G! LOL. :) Thanks for thinking of us.