Aghhhh personal space

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by Liahona, Mar 21, 2013.

  1. Liahona

    Liahona Guest

    This morning difficult child 3 told me that difficult child 2 rubbed his bottom and picked a scab off his head. I talk to gfgf2. He says he also rubbed his head. What I think happened is that difficult child 3 is sicker than difficult child 2 at the moment (all of us except difficult child 1 are sick) and difficult child 2 was trying to comfort him. It started as rubbing his head (which difficult child 3 really likes and because of this issue I discourage) then difficult child 2 picked the scab which difficult child 3 protested to and hid his head sticking his rear in the air. difficult child 2 doesn't see any difference between rubbing a head or rubbing a rear so he comforted difficult child 3's rear.

    I talked to difficult child 2 about not touching other people there. Then said he had to be in the hula hoop all day. The hula hoop is supposed to help them keep appropriate distance between themselves and other people. Yes, all day was harsh if me to say. I should've set a timer so difficult child 2 could see an end in sight. Mute point now. difficult child 2 destroyed the hula hoop, so now he is a shadow (has to be in sight) to husband. I tried having him be my shadow but I'm trying to put Cherub to sleep. She isn't sleeping well and wakes up very easily. difficult child 2 is just so noisy he woke her up by trying to be quite.

    Right now I am so frustrated with difficult child 2. We have been working on this issue. He knows better, and I'm out of ideas of how to get through to him. I'm also scared. This brings up memories of trying to keep kids safe when difficult child 1 would do the same thing, but for a very different reason. I'm scared that difficult child 2 will go down the same path difficult child 1 has, and its not a rational logical fear. It still lurks in the back if my mind.

    And I'm sick and exhausted and now have a very wide awake Cherub I'm trying to put back to sleep. That battle I might just give up on.

    thanks for listening to the vent and any ideas on how to teach personal space would be most welcome.
  2. buddy

    buddy New Member

    Awww Liability ( lol, look what auto correct did to your name!)

    Trying again ...

    Awww, Lia , I'm sorry! I bet you're right. First, you're sick. Second, this is triggering feelings from scarier times. difficult child 2 will be a challenge but his issues are far less ominous most likely. He will improve but it will be very slow.

    I think a shadow/time "in" is a fine idea (as long as not in addition to anger, ignoring, etc. It's a logical consequence in a "safety" issue. Not That at this point he is being unsafe, but if not learned, you know what may happen in society at large so it's pretty up there in importance (teaching wise) in my humble opinion. But, not panic -wise.

    Q still is pretty intrusive around others but each year does better. He is finally asking for high fives instead of jumping on backs to hug! Good thing now that he is so big.

    Such a common Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD) problem that most professionals who ever work with will not be surprised.

    He actually showed some sympathy which was the sweet part. I have had back scratching turn to skin removal episodes, hugs turn very uncomfortable, etc forever. It's a never ending goal on his IEP too

    You are a talented mom. It's alot for anyone to deal with but when sick? Well that's too much.
  3. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    I hope that today is better. Sigh. That's a lot of work!