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<blockquote data-quote="inthedark1" data-source="post: 657605" data-attributes="member: 19078"><p>Thank you all so much for the helpful responses. Just getting feedback from others going through somewhat of same thing is very helpful. My daughter went to counseling for a little bit. With the first counselor she would lie and blame it on me. I was willing to take all of it on me and told her I was sorry in order for her to stay in counseling. It didn't work. She told counselor that I needed to leave her alone about school and her grades. I told her in with the counselor that I would leave her alone. 2 weeks went by and I had not checked her grades or said anything to her. When I did check them she was flunking 2 classes and almost a third in which she needed to graduate. If I had not checked she probably would not had graduated. This is around same time she got picked up by cops for drinking. We had to pick her up at police station. We went back the counselor and when I told her about her grades and getting picked up by police she said she was shocked. So that didn't work. The 2nd one she went to one time and would not go back. She started seeing a 3rd counselor and went for a little while but then quit again. This counselor felt she was gettting close to bringing up trauma (rape incident) and then quit. Before the counselors I had taken her to a behavioral clinic. She agreed to go. They would take her but They were locked in and could not have their cell phones. The thought of her being there and I couldn't get in to see her or talk to her terrified </p><p>me. </p><p>I thought for sure she was on drugs also but could never find any. She had even been drug tested twice before starting jobs and was clean. The alcohol has been a huge problem. She drinks until she's trashed and she gets crazy....wants to fight, hurt herself, drives drunk....</p><p>Her dad has had to pick her up so many times from a bar in a town next to us. Her friends would call us and say she wouldn't leave and was getting crazy. One time her friends left her somewhere that was 25 miles away and we had to go get her. The cops picked her up again another night because she had called us saying she was lost. We called all the cops within a 50 mile radius. They found her passed out in her car off the side of a road. The cop told her dad he thought she was fine but was shocked when he had her do the breathalyzer. This is when she lost her license for 3 months for being under 18 - 0 tolerance. She was lucky she didn't get a DUI. I tbougbt this might wake her up but it didn't. We then voluntarily put a BAIID interlock device in her car. It was worth every penny. We knew she couldn't drive if she had been drinking. I knew at this time she had a problem. She had lost all her friends. They couldn't deal with her when she was drinking. </p><p>I just can't figure out what happened first. I wish I could put the pieces together. I don't think the trauma caused the drinking. She had started drinking before. She was trashed one night, crying and cutting herself when she told me that she used to be a good kid and they took advantage of her. That was the red flag for me thinking she had been taken advantage of sexually. I am truly haunted by this.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="inthedark1, post: 657605, member: 19078"] Thank you all so much for the helpful responses. Just getting feedback from others going through somewhat of same thing is very helpful. My daughter went to counseling for a little bit. With the first counselor she would lie and blame it on me. I was willing to take all of it on me and told her I was sorry in order for her to stay in counseling. It didn't work. She told counselor that I needed to leave her alone about school and her grades. I told her in with the counselor that I would leave her alone. 2 weeks went by and I had not checked her grades or said anything to her. When I did check them she was flunking 2 classes and almost a third in which she needed to graduate. If I had not checked she probably would not had graduated. This is around same time she got picked up by cops for drinking. We had to pick her up at police station. We went back the counselor and when I told her about her grades and getting picked up by police she said she was shocked. So that didn't work. The 2nd one she went to one time and would not go back. She started seeing a 3rd counselor and went for a little while but then quit again. This counselor felt she was gettting close to bringing up trauma (rape incident) and then quit. Before the counselors I had taken her to a behavioral clinic. She agreed to go. They would take her but They were locked in and could not have their cell phones. The thought of her being there and I couldn't get in to see her or talk to her terrified me. I thought for sure she was on drugs also but could never find any. She had even been drug tested twice before starting jobs and was clean. The alcohol has been a huge problem. She drinks until she's trashed and she gets crazy....wants to fight, hurt herself, drives drunk.... Her dad has had to pick her up so many times from a bar in a town next to us. Her friends would call us and say she wouldn't leave and was getting crazy. One time her friends left her somewhere that was 25 miles away and we had to go get her. The cops picked her up again another night because she had called us saying she was lost. We called all the cops within a 50 mile radius. They found her passed out in her car off the side of a road. The cop told her dad he thought she was fine but was shocked when he had her do the breathalyzer. This is when she lost her license for 3 months for being under 18 - 0 tolerance. She was lucky she didn't get a DUI. I tbougbt this might wake her up but it didn't. We then voluntarily put a BAIID interlock device in her car. It was worth every penny. We knew she couldn't drive if she had been drinking. I knew at this time she had a problem. She had lost all her friends. They couldn't deal with her when she was drinking. I just can't figure out what happened first. I wish I could put the pieces together. I don't think the trauma caused the drinking. She had started drinking before. She was trashed one night, crying and cutting herself when she told me that she used to be a good kid and they took advantage of her. That was the red flag for me thinking she had been taken advantage of sexually. I am truly haunted by this. [/QUOTE]
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