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<blockquote data-quote="Kathy813" data-source="post: 669612" data-attributes="member: 1967"><p>Hello and welcome. As you already know, there is no reason that you should be supporting two adults. My husband and I were doing the same thing as you were supporting our now 30-year-old adult daughter and it took two years of therapy before we were finally able to cut the financial cord and stop all financial support.</p><p></p><p>It was scary but she survived and is currently sober and working. We were prepared to cut off all contact if necessary but my husband now talks to her once a week (he calls her because he changed his number and she doesn't have it). I have chosen to take a break from her since our last visit where she was very ugly to me. I told my husband that I need to see action and not words and then I will be ready to reinstate contact.</p><p></p><p>I won't say it was easy but if you don't do it now you will end up supporting them until you are in your grave. What kind of quality of life is that for you?</p><p></p><p>You know that the suicide threats are emotional blackmail, right? That is why you might want to cut off contact for a period of time until they know that you mean business this time. It does get better with time.</p><p><img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/emoticons/group-hug.gif" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":group-hug:" title="group hug :group-hug:" data-shortname=":group-hug:" /></p><p>~Kathy</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Kathy813, post: 669612, member: 1967"] Hello and welcome. As you already know, there is no reason that you should be supporting two adults. My husband and I were doing the same thing as you were supporting our now 30-year-old adult daughter and it took two years of therapy before we were finally able to cut the financial cord and stop all financial support. It was scary but she survived and is currently sober and working. We were prepared to cut off all contact if necessary but my husband now talks to her once a week (he calls her because he changed his number and she doesn't have it). I have chosen to take a break from her since our last visit where she was very ugly to me. I told my husband that I need to see action and not words and then I will be ready to reinstate contact. I won't say it was easy but if you don't do it now you will end up supporting them until you are in your grave. What kind of quality of life is that for you? You know that the suicide threats are emotional blackmail, right? That is why you might want to cut off contact for a period of time until they know that you mean business this time. It does get better with time. :group-hug: ~Kathy [/QUOTE]
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