timer lady ,
the one thing I do have is a sense of humor , the lateral thinking - even if Dr Greene paid me I would still be in debt. But you are right I did not show it , in how I wrote my response .
I also wanted to make the point how much help is offered for free and how much indebted we should feel.
As to the question why CPS appears not to work this is my 2cents ( I can't say about your situation )
1 CPS is a process - it takes 30-40 cps experiences for a kid and adult to begin to acquire the skills and also trust the process . Also general chatting perspective taking, identifying concerns , talking about others helps kids acquire a problem solving mindset. Kids acquire the ability to work with the concepts while on the job. These discussions also help a kid get a sense of self and of others as well.
2. When I talk about a kid having no currency , I usually take it to mean that we can't leverage the kid's behavior using consequences or rewards. The main focus of cps is addressing the kid's concerns and having them addressed in appropriate ways
3 I do believe in the 10% principle of complementing CPS with interventions that are ' working with the child' - maybe medication for chronic mood or impulsivity , learning mindfullness or other relaxation techniques , sport , having a hobby or interest , mentors , healthy diet , good sleep , positive peers , maybe a new environment which teaches skills , emotionally empowering where staff can reach a kid.
4 our kids can have plenty baggage of unsolved problems , difficulties in handling the art of living - it is a learning process that takes place on the job , not in a classroom.
It is hard, hard, hard work , a long process , but for me still a lot easier than trying to control my difficult child with reward and consequences.
Some sds are moving away from punishment - you catch more flies with honey than vinegar using PBS - positive behavior support programs , also with skills training ( direct and top down ) , but not collaborating with the child.
to sign off with good advice
If you have a headache , take a bottle of aspirin and do what it says on the bottle - take 2
keep away from children
Allan