I'm really going through a tough time with blame and guilt over my daughter....Lately I've been re running in my head all the horrible things that have happened...everything I should have done differently. It's so much harder for me sometimes....I have a severe ODD child and one that had exceptional behavior. It makes it so much harder for me and for her...she hates him for it. He has a lot of trouble with dealing with it....he's become a people pleaser. When things are really bad he will go to the extreme to be good and take pressure off, and again it makes her hate him more. Anyhow tonight we had a family bowling party....on my fiances side, which will be her step family...and she is having trouble accepting. She was so miserable at the beginning, just sitting there with a sour look. I left her alone, and didn't even talk to her. Eventually to my surprise she opened up and even started dancing to the music, and doing funny bowling moves. My heart just swelled, but the hurtful part was I couldn't show her, because the second I showed interest or happiness she got this horrible look.....But at the end she was talking to me and joking. I was on edge, and trying to be careful. We did leave before my son and fiance, she had enough, and that's fine. As long as she made an effort. I have to be careful not to overwhelm her. What is killing me is that I have to totally back off and be stand offish for her to open up....I just want to hug and love her so much. This is slowly killing me....I'm so scared for the future. She is failing grade 8. The things that makes me just livid is when I went to pick up her report....she had all these missing assignments that had zero for a mark, but the things she did they were all about 85% to 100%. How can I help her achieve her gifted ability?????? I feel like it's my fault because I didn't parent her properly....I'm depressed!