Amazing Grace

[Star*]

difficult child adopted daughter had her D and C Friday. Her Mother just called me, with what she described as the good news. As elated as we both are? She says she can't WAIT to get pregnant again.

(BANG HER HEAD HERE) Her Mother said she's done. Not only did she not thank her for being there for her - she cursed her out in the hospital (as she lost the babies) but she was trying to be empathetic and she went all difficult child on her screaming her in the hospital in front of doctors and staff for being frank about the babies Father not being there to hold her hand.

She lost her job over all this mess, and is very upset that now she has to stay home and watch her children. (boo hoo)

Friend says - Time to live my own life - I couldn't agree more. She needs a break. For the rest of her life.

I am never happy over loss - but in this case? Elated.

 

[HaoZi]

Any way to get her fixed against her will (or maybe without her knowledge)?
Glad your friend is ready to reclaim her own life.

 

[Hound dog]

Usually, with difficult child children like that, there is a point where any parent will finally say enough, I'm done. She had better chances of saying that because she has YOU as her bff, her example, her hope that she can learn to enjoy life without difficult child drama if she wants it bad enough.

I'm never glad over a loss either, but I'll tell ya I think someone above may have said enough as well on this one. Hopefully karma will continue to bite your adopted niece in the fanny until she starts doing some heavy duty growing up. ugh

 

[Star*]

I don't know if she is sincere in her statment.....but to add fuel to her fire? This is a very "signs" seeking family. They are stuck somewhere between not embracing fully their Native American roots (just the parts that give them the 'oh I'm Native, and look I have a vision", but not the full deal, and wanting to go to Christian church, but being angry with God for all their loss and not understanding the blessings in it and moving on. Just not able to get past a lot of stumbling blocks and I feel sad for them all, especially my friend - she's got a really lovely heart. The fuel part was that the babies were lost on Karys birthday (my 'adopted' son that died - adopted daughters brother) Now she's trying to put a reason behind all of this as if they were taken from her (daughter) because of something she did or didn't do.

I told my friend - NOW is the time for SERIOUS counseling. She finally agreed, but we both agreed you can only lead the horse TO water. The infuriating part came when she said she can't WAIT to get pregnant!

Haozi - there is such a thing - it's called BIRTH CONTROL and idiot refuses to be on it. NOrplant, the shots, condoms, the pills. She is who she is and that's just going to be it for her and her kids. Very very sad that there isn't a law passed for Grandparents who raise their children stating that if they do the parents have to be on birthcontrol. THAT would solve a lot of problems.

 

[AnnieO]

Good grief.

Hopefully the Great Spirit or whoever has truly had ENOUGH. Geez.

 

[Star*]

You saidem mouthful, and Amen. It's really a sad situation. All you can do is love her, listen to her, and move on.

 

[Shari]

amen

 

[Hound dog]

This is a very "signs" seeking family. They are stuck somewhere between not embracing fully their Native American roots (just the parts that give them the 'oh I'm Native, and look I have a vision", but not the full deal, and wanting to go to Christian church, but being angry with God for all their loss and not understanding the blessings in it and moving on.

This I actually do "get". You just described my sibs. It actually does a number on their brains/thought processes. Or at least it has for my sibs. Me? I made my choice, and I'm quite happy with it. I no longer have "conflict". Something my mom is now seriously pondering as she was certain my choice would not only destroy my life but sent me straight to hades. Instead, I'm the most stable kid she has. lol

If there is a message? I don't think it would be a stretch to say that it is to STOP with the babies already. Children are gifts, but only if you treat them as such. Grandma raising them? She's not treating them as gifts........that goes for both sides of the coin.

Hopefully your friend can see that with help and finally break free.