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An uneasy yet familiar feeling...
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<blockquote data-quote="blackgnat" data-source="post: 625924" data-attributes="member: 13561"><p>I would like to vent about one more thing. I have moved 4 times in the past year and love my current living situation. I have written to difficult child in jail and put this address on all correspondence.</p><p></p><p>Today when I got the mail, there was a letter from a collection agency, addressed to my son at this address. How the hell did THAT happen? He owes $2K to a psychiatrist that he saw a year ago. I just saw red because this apartment is my haven and I DON'T want it tainted by my difficult child's issues. I called the guy immediately and told him that my son doesn't live here and that I don't want any contact from him regarding my son's finances.</p><p></p><p>I then told him that my son was in jail in Colorado. I guess I figured that the agency would realize that he wasn't a good candidate for repayment. The guy asked me which city he was in and I said I wasn't going to give him any more information, but had just called to tell him that I didn't want to hear from the agency again.</p><p></p><p>I am now feeling so guilty-I gave up info about my son, instead of just ignoring the letter or saying I didn't know where my son is. I started projecting, "Oh, my poor kid, they will contact him in jail, and he will realize how hopeless life is on the outside and that he has no chance of succeeding without people breathing down his neck". There's also a part of me that is afraid of what my son will say if he finds out I gave up the info (I don't have to tell him of course) and another part that is "Well, THIS will put him off coming back to Illinois" .</p><p></p><p>But mostly that my peace of mind has been violated and there's no safe place for me to be in my own space.</p><p></p><p>Thanks so much for reading and sorry it is all so long. Many thoughts jumbling around in my head. Would love some clarity for anyone who has some ! Thanks!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="blackgnat, post: 625924, member: 13561"] I would like to vent about one more thing. I have moved 4 times in the past year and love my current living situation. I have written to difficult child in jail and put this address on all correspondence. Today when I got the mail, there was a letter from a collection agency, addressed to my son at this address. How the hell did THAT happen? He owes $2K to a psychiatrist that he saw a year ago. I just saw red because this apartment is my haven and I DON'T want it tainted by my difficult child's issues. I called the guy immediately and told him that my son doesn't live here and that I don't want any contact from him regarding my son's finances. I then told him that my son was in jail in Colorado. I guess I figured that the agency would realize that he wasn't a good candidate for repayment. The guy asked me which city he was in and I said I wasn't going to give him any more information, but had just called to tell him that I didn't want to hear from the agency again. I am now feeling so guilty-I gave up info about my son, instead of just ignoring the letter or saying I didn't know where my son is. I started projecting, "Oh, my poor kid, they will contact him in jail, and he will realize how hopeless life is on the outside and that he has no chance of succeeding without people breathing down his neck". There's also a part of me that is afraid of what my son will say if he finds out I gave up the info (I don't have to tell him of course) and another part that is "Well, THIS will put him off coming back to Illinois" . But mostly that my peace of mind has been violated and there's no safe place for me to be in my own space. Thanks so much for reading and sorry it is all so long. Many thoughts jumbling around in my head. Would love some clarity for anyone who has some ! Thanks! [/QUOTE]
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An uneasy yet familiar feeling...
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