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And so dawns another day......
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<blockquote data-quote="AllStressedOut" data-source="post: 74075" data-attributes="member: 3837"><p>We had a bathroom problem as well. Prior to me marrying husband his ex swore there was something physically wrong with my difficult children. So husband took the boys to the doctor, had them checked out, it was nothing physical. When husband and I married I didn't want to get mad at the boys or punish them, if they truly couldn't help it, so I started documenting everything on a calendar. What they were doing when it happened, what class they were in, who they were with, what was the activity, etc. I found out oldest difficult child would have a BM in his pants rather than stop playing a game, stop watching a movie or if it was in PE. Found out later that PE told all the kids "Do NOT ask to go the bathroom in here, you won't be allowed." WHAT?!?!?! So needless to say I put my "big girl panties" on and went up to the school and had a nice long chat with the PE Dept. Don't you EVER tell my kid they can't go to the bathroom! Anyways, after about 6 months of documenting when it happened, I started grounding my kids if they had the problem. The 1st step was they themselves had to take the nasty underwear and clean it out in a clean toilet. Which meant they had to clean the toilet, then wash the undies. They were disgusted by this and rightly should be. But this was the most natural consequence I could think of, to make them responsible for their own nastiness. And since what was in their underwear should have been in the toilet, it was the only place I could come up with to have it cleaned in. I didn't want BM in my sink or bathtub.</p><p></p><p>My recommendation is to start documenting when this happens, at school or at home. What teacher, what class, what were they doing and so on. When you do get medical insurance again, have her tested to be sure she is healthy and this isn't physical. It doesn't sound physical, but if you have her tested, you are basically covering your own but*. When/If the tests say physically she is fine, you would have already started the documentation to discover what the problem is. My son had problems transitioning from his main teacher to the art teacher, library, music etc. You'll need to document so you can refer to it later because with so many kids, especially difficult children, its just too difficult to remember.</p><p></p><p>I know what you mean about staying at home with difficult children to avoid public opinion. Mine can't behave in public either. I've thought about making t-shirts up that list my kids DXs and have 7 printed, one for each day of the week. Maybe then the hairy eyeball wouldn't happen as often if people could look at my seemingly perfect child and realize just because they don't have physical diformaties(sp?) doesn't mean they're perfect.</p><p></p><p>My heart goes out to you Gramma!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="AllStressedOut, post: 74075, member: 3837"] We had a bathroom problem as well. Prior to me marrying husband his ex swore there was something physically wrong with my difficult children. So husband took the boys to the doctor, had them checked out, it was nothing physical. When husband and I married I didn't want to get mad at the boys or punish them, if they truly couldn't help it, so I started documenting everything on a calendar. What they were doing when it happened, what class they were in, who they were with, what was the activity, etc. I found out oldest difficult child would have a BM in his pants rather than stop playing a game, stop watching a movie or if it was in PE. Found out later that PE told all the kids "Do NOT ask to go the bathroom in here, you won't be allowed." WHAT?!?!?! So needless to say I put my "big girl panties" on and went up to the school and had a nice long chat with the PE Dept. Don't you EVER tell my kid they can't go to the bathroom! Anyways, after about 6 months of documenting when it happened, I started grounding my kids if they had the problem. The 1st step was they themselves had to take the nasty underwear and clean it out in a clean toilet. Which meant they had to clean the toilet, then wash the undies. They were disgusted by this and rightly should be. But this was the most natural consequence I could think of, to make them responsible for their own nastiness. And since what was in their underwear should have been in the toilet, it was the only place I could come up with to have it cleaned in. I didn't want BM in my sink or bathtub. My recommendation is to start documenting when this happens, at school or at home. What teacher, what class, what were they doing and so on. When you do get medical insurance again, have her tested to be sure she is healthy and this isn't physical. It doesn't sound physical, but if you have her tested, you are basically covering your own but*. When/If the tests say physically she is fine, you would have already started the documentation to discover what the problem is. My son had problems transitioning from his main teacher to the art teacher, library, music etc. You'll need to document so you can refer to it later because with so many kids, especially difficult children, its just too difficult to remember. I know what you mean about staying at home with difficult children to avoid public opinion. Mine can't behave in public either. I've thought about making t-shirts up that list my kids DXs and have 7 printed, one for each day of the week. Maybe then the hairy eyeball wouldn't happen as often if people could look at my seemingly perfect child and realize just because they don't have physical diformaties(sp?) doesn't mean they're perfect. My heart goes out to you Gramma! [/QUOTE]
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