Angry 8 year old

sarah brown

New Member
Hi, Could you give me some advice. 90% of the time my 9 year old daughter is loving, caring kind and shows amazing intelligence. However, she is overly sensitive and she has outbursts which can turn violent. They are usually sparked by her getting annoyed or rude. I then ask her to go to her room for 5 mins as a consequence. Most of the time she will do this, often with a stamp and moan but she goes and then will say sorry after her time out and its forgotten. Around once a week she refuses to go to her room which then results in me leading her to her room and asking her not to leave, she does often. Then she throws things at us, shouts,hits and throws things around her room. We have been advised to try to give her no attention for her outburst and wait till she calms down. When she acts violently we tell her once we are going to put her in her room until she has been calm for one minute and will not give her any attention until this is done. This often leads to us having to physically hold her door shut as we have no other way of keeping her in her room. She shows no anger at school or anywhere else and has never behaved like this in front of anyone. When she is in her room one second she is saying sorry how sorry she is and then the next she is kicking the door and saying how much she hates us. Any advice please as we are struggling. Thanks


Staff member
I am so sorry your daughter is struggling with anger issues. I have no experience with this parenting situation but I have had some big challenges in my parenting journey when my daughter was older.

I just wanted to let you know that I read your post and wanted to offer you my support.



Well-Known Member
I would recommend a book called "The Explosive Child" by Ross Greene and also his website/organisation Lives in the Balance. Your daughter sounds as if she is explosive, occasionally if not frequently (lucky you!) and he sets out an alternative method that involves teaching the child the skills he/she lacks to deal with situations non-explosively. For certain kids, I think it's the only approach that has a chance of working.