anorexia in preteen

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by navy-vet, Mar 26, 2009.

  1. navy-vet

    navy-vet New Member

    I am new here, but I am looking for feedback regarding a girl in my neighborhood that plays often with my children. I suspect that she has (among other behaviors) an eating disorder. We have had her to our home for meals frequently. She is 10 years old, underweight, skin is sallow with dark circles under her eyes. She is also hyper-active and often has a bottle of soda pop or sweets or some type of chips with her. At meals she drinks copious (4-5 servings) amounts of water, picks at her food and always asks to use our bathroom during or after the meal. But she is always eager to return to have a meal with us. Her home situation is: parents--divorced & her mother has some chronic health issues; a sister (15) who seems well-adjusted and healthy; a brother (12) who is mildly retarded but has violent tendencies that have brought the police to their home. We have banned her from our property for a month due to her chronic lies and tendency to cause discord amongst our & other children. 3 other families in our block have banned her also. She now has a "Big Sister" to meet with weekly. What insights into her behavior does anyone have for us? Should I share my observations with her mother? :confused:
  2. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    There is no way to know what's going on. She may be abused at home. She may have a mental illness. I don't know if the mother even cares...but maybe she DOES and is working on it. But, sure, if you approach her in a compassionate, caring way, I don't see anything wrong with it.
  3. eekysign

    eekysign New Member

    She sounds diabetic!
  4. klmno

    klmno Active Member

    This sounds more like a secondary eating disorder- secondary to other stressors and possible meal issues at home to me. It's still a serious matter, but I doubt it's anorexia in the true sense. Anyway, if they already have in home help from other agencies, it appears that maybe someone is already working on this. It probably wouldn't hurt to kindly share concerns with the parent.
  5. DaisyFace

    DaisyFace Love me...Love me not

    Clearly this girl has some troubles and some stress at home....

    Perhaps instead of sharing your insights about her eating habits--you might inquire of her parents if there is anything that you might do to help relieve some of the obvious stress that is happening within their family right now? Share a cup of coffee....get to know the parents....

  6. Stella

    Stella New Member

    I like Daisy's suggestion. You will have to be really cautious about how you approach this. I think how you word it will make all the difference. It's good of you to be so concerned - most people are so wrapped up in their own lives to notice anybody elses kids!