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Another update.
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<blockquote data-quote="SeekingStrength" data-source="post: 645450" data-attributes="member: 17635"><p>Esri, Huge hugs.</p><p></p><p>I am so sorry. My difficult child is very vindictive. What your daughter did sounds exactly what my difficult child would have done- vandalizing the car.</p><p></p><p>It does get easier, but not overnight. This board helped husband and me tremendously.</p><p></p><p>You know what, we do not deserve this treatment. I hope you get mad. Getting mad helped husband and me a lot. For so many years, we worried and blamed ourselves. It took over a decade to realize, <em><strong>Hey, this is totally unacceptable. difficult child is being a total jerk and we do not deserve this, nor should we tolerate it.</strong></em></p><p></p><p>Your daughter is choosing to play the victim. She is NOT a victim. You do not deserve this kind of treatment. You would not accept it from anybody else. Part of your hurt may come from remembering the past, how things were different. But, you know what, right now, this is who your daughter is. It is not okay. <strong>Nobody</strong> should treat <strong>anybody</strong> like this.</p><p></p><p>Please, stay with us. Post often. It helps.</p><p></p><p>And, absolutely, do something kind for yourself every single day. I hope you post tomorrow what nice/fun/comforting thing you did for YOU. Those posts are uplifting for all of us hurting moms.</p><p></p><p>Guaranteed, you will feel better. It takes time and you must take steps to separate yourself from the crazy. As everybody else, I am here for you.</p><p></p><p>And don't you dare second guess yourself about shutting off the phone. If you were not sure about that decision before, you must know now that you made the right decision.</p><p></p><p>People treat us as badly as we allow them to treat us.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="SeekingStrength, post: 645450, member: 17635"] Esri, Huge hugs. I am so sorry. My difficult child is very vindictive. What your daughter did sounds exactly what my difficult child would have done- vandalizing the car. It does get easier, but not overnight. This board helped husband and me tremendously. You know what, we do not deserve this treatment. I hope you get mad. Getting mad helped husband and me a lot. For so many years, we worried and blamed ourselves. It took over a decade to realize, [I][B]Hey, this is totally unacceptable. difficult child is being a total jerk and we do not deserve this, nor should we tolerate it.[/B][/I] Your daughter is choosing to play the victim. She is NOT a victim. You do not deserve this kind of treatment. You would not accept it from anybody else. Part of your hurt may come from remembering the past, how things were different. But, you know what, right now, this is who your daughter is. It is not okay. [B]Nobody[/B] should treat [B]anybody[/B] like this. Please, stay with us. Post often. It helps. And, absolutely, do something kind for yourself every single day. I hope you post tomorrow what nice/fun/comforting thing you did for YOU. Those posts are uplifting for all of us hurting moms. Guaranteed, you will feel better. It takes time and you must take steps to separate yourself from the crazy. As everybody else, I am here for you. And don't you dare second guess yourself about shutting off the phone. If you were not sure about that decision before, you must know now that you made the right decision. People treat us as badly as we allow them to treat us. [/QUOTE]
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