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ant and his complex life
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<blockquote data-quote="DDD" data-source="post: 38932" data-attributes="member: 35"><p>I, too, am sorry. Sadly, I am not at all surprised by the latest</p><p>turn of events.</p><p></p><p>I'm going to give you a suggestion. It worked for me. I believe</p><p>it could work for you. First you have to completely think about</p><p>what having Kaleb will mean to you and your future...you will not</p><p>have a chance for a peaceful old age. Period. If after a full</p><p>analysis you decide to save Kaleb, then stop and realize that</p><p>Ant WILL reproduce again. What will you do then? Would you</p><p>decide to keep your life with Kaleb simple and not include the</p><p>new sibling?? Do you acknowledge that Ant and the Mother will</p><p>force the issue of Kaleb deserving to know is little brother or</p><p>sister? It is ugly.</p><p></p><p>After thinking that thru, the next step is to recognize that</p><p>neither Ant or Kalebs Mom want Kaleb and the responsibility he</p><p>brings. BUT they don't want to give up their parental rights or</p><p>any money he can bring. So...you have to "buy" Kaleb in a quiet</p><p>nice polite legal way.</p><p></p><p>You figure out what each of the parents want. Free babysitter.</p><p>Free time. Lack of responsibility. Occasional fun showing him</p><p>off?? You get a Durable Power of Attorney written up by a lawyer</p><p>that says that you have the right to make decisions about his health, education etc. (it's standard, I think). Then you meet</p><p>with them individually and tell them. "I know how much you love</p><p>Kaleb. You know how much I love him too. It is hard for you to</p><p>have to provide for him on a daily basis blah blah blah. I would</p><p>like to keep Kaleb at my house. He will always have family to</p><p>babysit, the daycare or school will be good blah blah BUT I don't</p><p>want custody of "your" child. (That is called bait!) on the other hand I</p><p>have to be able to make sure he is cared for properly. IF you</p><p>would like me to, I will have a paper written up for you to sign</p><p>that allows me to take him to the Doctors, sign him up in school,</p><p>etc. etc. Then you will be able to work and ?? (fill in the blank). Of course, you will be able to see him blah blah blah.</p><p></p><p>I have two boys with that piece of paper I have not had one single problem being their Mom. It could work for you too.</p><p></p><p>It is NOT an easy road but for us it was the only way we could</p><p>alleviate our fears for the boys safety. DDD</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="DDD, post: 38932, member: 35"] I, too, am sorry. Sadly, I am not at all surprised by the latest turn of events. I'm going to give you a suggestion. It worked for me. I believe it could work for you. First you have to completely think about what having Kaleb will mean to you and your future...you will not have a chance for a peaceful old age. Period. If after a full analysis you decide to save Kaleb, then stop and realize that Ant WILL reproduce again. What will you do then? Would you decide to keep your life with Kaleb simple and not include the new sibling?? Do you acknowledge that Ant and the Mother will force the issue of Kaleb deserving to know is little brother or sister? It is ugly. After thinking that thru, the next step is to recognize that neither Ant or Kalebs Mom want Kaleb and the responsibility he brings. BUT they don't want to give up their parental rights or any money he can bring. So...you have to "buy" Kaleb in a quiet nice polite legal way. You figure out what each of the parents want. Free babysitter. Free time. Lack of responsibility. Occasional fun showing him off?? You get a Durable Power of Attorney written up by a lawyer that says that you have the right to make decisions about his health, education etc. (it's standard, I think). Then you meet with them individually and tell them. "I know how much you love Kaleb. You know how much I love him too. It is hard for you to have to provide for him on a daily basis blah blah blah. I would like to keep Kaleb at my house. He will always have family to babysit, the daycare or school will be good blah blah BUT I don't want custody of "your" child. (That is called bait!) on the other hand I have to be able to make sure he is cared for properly. IF you would like me to, I will have a paper written up for you to sign that allows me to take him to the Doctors, sign him up in school, etc. etc. Then you will be able to work and ?? (fill in the blank). Of course, you will be able to see him blah blah blah. I have two boys with that piece of paper I have not had one single problem being their Mom. It could work for you too. It is NOT an easy road but for us it was the only way we could alleviate our fears for the boys safety. DDD [/QUOTE]
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