There is a classical concert both of my kids are DYING to go to, and I'm DYING to take them to. It's a black tie event. I paid a lot of money for tickets and I don't want to give this up. I knew it would be challenging but they've both been to classical concerts separately and did fine. But we had a miserable experience last night, and now I'm really nervous.
I can take either one as a single kid, anywhere, and I can get manageable behavior out of him. easy child is more manageable than difficult child, but it's doable.
I'll spare the details, but both boys just egg each other on. In situations where I need them to sit still and be quiet, like a brief contract signing thing we had last night, instead they were rolling on the floor, hitting each other, running away, etc. One look from the other kid and BAM! They're off again.
difficult child's therapist had coached him previously on the art of saying things to classmates like, "Better not. We might get in trouble," or "We'll do that at recess" when he needs to stay quiet. Didn't work at ALL. easy child normally doesn't get out of control unless he's with his brother. I think they'll both be engaged with the actual music - but there's getting to the seats, not climbing on the railings, not running through a crowd of sequined-gowned, tux wearing people. I'm shuddering just thinking about it.
What would you do to properly motivate, and manage misbehavior in a situation where refined behavior is expected? Would you practice with them beforehand? Obviously the consequence for screwing around at the concert is that we will immediately go to the car - I made sure to buy seats on the aisle. Just so you know, a consequence doled out in the moment, such as "You just lost TV time for tomorrow" will result in loud wails - not good for a concert hall.
Ack, anyone want my tickets?
I can take either one as a single kid, anywhere, and I can get manageable behavior out of him. easy child is more manageable than difficult child, but it's doable.
I'll spare the details, but both boys just egg each other on. In situations where I need them to sit still and be quiet, like a brief contract signing thing we had last night, instead they were rolling on the floor, hitting each other, running away, etc. One look from the other kid and BAM! They're off again.
difficult child's therapist had coached him previously on the art of saying things to classmates like, "Better not. We might get in trouble," or "We'll do that at recess" when he needs to stay quiet. Didn't work at ALL. easy child normally doesn't get out of control unless he's with his brother. I think they'll both be engaged with the actual music - but there's getting to the seats, not climbing on the railings, not running through a crowd of sequined-gowned, tux wearing people. I'm shuddering just thinking about it.
What would you do to properly motivate, and manage misbehavior in a situation where refined behavior is expected? Would you practice with them beforehand? Obviously the consequence for screwing around at the concert is that we will immediately go to the car - I made sure to buy seats on the aisle. Just so you know, a consequence doled out in the moment, such as "You just lost TV time for tomorrow" will result in loud wails - not good for a concert hall.
Ack, anyone want my tickets?