Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
Anyone else feel quite like this?
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="trinityroyal" data-source="post: 72356" data-attributes="member: 3907"><p>Putting on my ADHD/Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD) hat for a moment, I want to share what it was like from inside the meltdown, FWIW. I used to have terrible tantrums when I was younger, right into my teens and 20s (still do occasionally, when stress levels just get to be too much). When I see the same behaviour in my difficult child, it frustrates and saddens me, because I know how it feels, and I know what he's doing.</p><p></p><p>Right before the meltdown happened, there was always a period of building frustration. As the frustration level got higher, my ability to talk coherently would get lower and lower, which made the frustration even worse. Eventually, it would get to the point where I felt something like an electric jolt in my head. It was at that point that I was either able to calm myself down, or I would lose it completely, and be in a full throwing-things-and-screaming tantrum.</p><p></p><p>The key is that, in that moment, I could have stopped myself. It was an act of pure self-indulgence to let myself go, but go I would, and then once I was in the middle of the tantrum, it was much harder to pull back from it. </p><p></p><p>My difficult child is the same. If he's not getting his way, the frustration builds up, he loses his words, and before I know it he's shrieking like a banshee and flailing his (now very long) arms and legs, and I bundle him off to his room. Interestingly...once he's in his room, he stamps, bangs the walls and throws things for a while, and then inevitably, he falls onto his bed and sleeps for hours. There is definitely a big element of self-stimulation in the arguments and tantrums. </p><p></p><p>I have found that , like Babbs mentioned, the deadpan face and responding to inflamatory statements in a monotone voice helps to keep difficult child from completely losing it. Although, when he gets no joy from me, he tries it on with SO. Over time SO has also learned not to react. Now, if we can just teach the rest of the family (sigh).</p><p></p><p>I'm not sure if any of this is useful, but it might give you a hint as to what's going on in your difficult child's head when the meltdown in brewing.</p><p></p><p>All the best</p><p>Trinity</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="trinityroyal, post: 72356, member: 3907"] Putting on my ADHD/Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD) hat for a moment, I want to share what it was like from inside the meltdown, FWIW. I used to have terrible tantrums when I was younger, right into my teens and 20s (still do occasionally, when stress levels just get to be too much). When I see the same behaviour in my difficult child, it frustrates and saddens me, because I know how it feels, and I know what he's doing. Right before the meltdown happened, there was always a period of building frustration. As the frustration level got higher, my ability to talk coherently would get lower and lower, which made the frustration even worse. Eventually, it would get to the point where I felt something like an electric jolt in my head. It was at that point that I was either able to calm myself down, or I would lose it completely, and be in a full throwing-things-and-screaming tantrum. The key is that, in that moment, I could have stopped myself. It was an act of pure self-indulgence to let myself go, but go I would, and then once I was in the middle of the tantrum, it was much harder to pull back from it. My difficult child is the same. If he's not getting his way, the frustration builds up, he loses his words, and before I know it he's shrieking like a banshee and flailing his (now very long) arms and legs, and I bundle him off to his room. Interestingly...once he's in his room, he stamps, bangs the walls and throws things for a while, and then inevitably, he falls onto his bed and sleeps for hours. There is definitely a big element of self-stimulation in the arguments and tantrums. I have found that , like Babbs mentioned, the deadpan face and responding to inflamatory statements in a monotone voice helps to keep difficult child from completely losing it. Although, when he gets no joy from me, he tries it on with SO. Over time SO has also learned not to react. Now, if we can just teach the rest of the family (sigh). I'm not sure if any of this is useful, but it might give you a hint as to what's going on in your difficult child's head when the meltdown in brewing. All the best Trinity [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
Anyone else feel quite like this?
Top