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Anyone else just chilling in peace on Christmas Eve?
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 643024" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>Cedar, when I married my first husband, he had a large family gathering for the holidays. I got my kids all dressed up (all the kids dressed up) and brought them over to my ex's aunts beautiful home where it smelled like bread and the tree was large and beautifully decorated and a bunch of civil folks sat around on very nice furinture in their expensive suits (and some ties) talking to one another, cracking jokes, being nice.Upper class nice. We were the only ones who did not have a lot of money and it made me feel self-conscious, but I tried to socialize and act interested as they spoke about their money for the sakes of our kids, who seemed to be having fun.</p><p></p><p>A bit of irony follows.</p><p></p><p>To this day, all three of my grown kids who are ex's legal children, have told me they hated going to Aunt D's house as it was too croweded, they didn't like their cousins, and it was boring. That shocked me. I thought we were making memories. Also, this aunt had three model boys. One was an architect who has designed a huge movie theater in a big town in Illinois plus many others. I forgot the middle boy's trade, but he was the best looking, the funniest, and financially successful. The youngest was a doctor who, at one time, was listed in some list of American's One Hundred Most Promising Young Men. I'm sure I have the name wrong, but he was in it, whatever the dang list was.</p><p></p><p>That was until he quit being a brilliant doctor to become a minister, making his wife go back to work and putting his three kids in daycare, which ticked off his brothers since a lot of his medical school money had been paid for by Grandma. Grandma wasn't too happy either, but she never said much as she was not a trash talker. The family is definitely Christian, but did not appreciate what this young man did. They felt he should have stayed a doctor. I don't know much more. This was a hush-hush family. The details on how the family broke apart came in bits and pieces. Here is the rest, as I heard it.</p><p></p><p>Then the two oldest boys had a falling out when the middle son confronted his father on his alcoholism. I had not even guessed there was alcohol abuse in that perfect family. The oldest son was mortified that his brother dared to bring it up to his sainted father and last I heard they never speak, never see each other, haven't for twenty or so years. the youngest...doctor turned minister...got out of Dodge way before THAT fight and was estranged from his brothers as soon as he decided to preach, kind of, in his brother's opinions, throwing grandma's vast amount of money and donation to help him get into medication school...down the toilet.</p><p></p><p>The family looked perfect on the outside. If anyone would have filmed a Christmas Eve there and shown it on television, you would have been touched to watch it. They did Christmas Eve because they are of Danish descent and Christmas Eve is the bgger holiday for them. My kids all agreed that the next day, spent alone with just us, was much more fun for them.</p><p></p><p>At any rate, somewhere in here is a lesson, but I got off track and forgot it <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" /></p><p></p><p>Oh, yeah.</p><p></p><p>Small, cozy holidays with those you love or the person you love the most...beats huge family dramas and surface good behavior....at least to me.</p><p></p><p>And do you know what? Every day can be a holiday if we want it to be. We control our days and our calendar. Don't we?</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 643024, member: 1550"] Cedar, when I married my first husband, he had a large family gathering for the holidays. I got my kids all dressed up (all the kids dressed up) and brought them over to my ex's aunts beautiful home where it smelled like bread and the tree was large and beautifully decorated and a bunch of civil folks sat around on very nice furinture in their expensive suits (and some ties) talking to one another, cracking jokes, being nice.Upper class nice. We were the only ones who did not have a lot of money and it made me feel self-conscious, but I tried to socialize and act interested as they spoke about their money for the sakes of our kids, who seemed to be having fun. A bit of irony follows. To this day, all three of my grown kids who are ex's legal children, have told me they hated going to Aunt D's house as it was too croweded, they didn't like their cousins, and it was boring. That shocked me. I thought we were making memories. Also, this aunt had three model boys. One was an architect who has designed a huge movie theater in a big town in Illinois plus many others. I forgot the middle boy's trade, but he was the best looking, the funniest, and financially successful. The youngest was a doctor who, at one time, was listed in some list of American's One Hundred Most Promising Young Men. I'm sure I have the name wrong, but he was in it, whatever the dang list was. That was until he quit being a brilliant doctor to become a minister, making his wife go back to work and putting his three kids in daycare, which ticked off his brothers since a lot of his medical school money had been paid for by Grandma. Grandma wasn't too happy either, but she never said much as she was not a trash talker. The family is definitely Christian, but did not appreciate what this young man did. They felt he should have stayed a doctor. I don't know much more. This was a hush-hush family. The details on how the family broke apart came in bits and pieces. Here is the rest, as I heard it. Then the two oldest boys had a falling out when the middle son confronted his father on his alcoholism. I had not even guessed there was alcohol abuse in that perfect family. The oldest son was mortified that his brother dared to bring it up to his sainted father and last I heard they never speak, never see each other, haven't for twenty or so years. the youngest...doctor turned minister...got out of Dodge way before THAT fight and was estranged from his brothers as soon as he decided to preach, kind of, in his brother's opinions, throwing grandma's vast amount of money and donation to help him get into medication school...down the toilet. The family looked perfect on the outside. If anyone would have filmed a Christmas Eve there and shown it on television, you would have been touched to watch it. They did Christmas Eve because they are of Danish descent and Christmas Eve is the bgger holiday for them. My kids all agreed that the next day, spent alone with just us, was much more fun for them. At any rate, somewhere in here is a lesson, but I got off track and forgot it :) Oh, yeah. Small, cozy holidays with those you love or the person you love the most...beats huge family dramas and surface good behavior....at least to me. And do you know what? Every day can be a holiday if we want it to be. We control our days and our calendar. Don't we? [/QUOTE]
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Anyone else just chilling in peace on Christmas Eve?
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