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General Parenting
Anyone have an older teen/young adult who was diagnosis'd with ODD as a child?
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<blockquote data-quote="Nandina" data-source="post: 760190" data-attributes="member: 23742"><p>Hello Jan, and welcome. This is sort of an old thread and I’m not sure if the person who started it is still active on this site.</p><p></p><p>But what you say here is exactly how I feel about my own son, who at age 20, is beginning to get it a little together. Baby steps!</p><p></p><p>I will always help him if he is trying to help himself, and clearly needs my help—sometimes financially, always through guidance, and never shielding him from consequences if he messes up. I have told him if he does something stupid and ends up in jail, I will not bail him out! And I won’t.</p><p></p><p>When you consistently protect your child from consequences, you are delaying their maturity and growth. Not only do they stay dependent on you, they begin to expect—even feel entitled—to such treatment.</p><p></p><p>It’s so very hard to watch your child suffer consequences when your instinct is to rush in and save them! But such consequences are the key to growth and learning.</p><p></p><p>I’ve had to do that with all three of my children, for varying reasons. As tough as it was for me to let them suffer their consequences at times, the two oldest fared well, and the youngest and most difficult, is making strides toward maturity. It’s a long process, maturing, and with a boy, it can continue well into their twenties.</p><p></p><p>Thanks for contributing. I think your message should be required reading here! All the best to you.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Nandina, post: 760190, member: 23742"] Hello Jan, and welcome. This is sort of an old thread and I’m not sure if the person who started it is still active on this site. But what you say here is exactly how I feel about my own son, who at age 20, is beginning to get it a little together. Baby steps! I will always help him if he is trying to help himself, and clearly needs my help—sometimes financially, always through guidance, and never shielding him from consequences if he messes up. I have told him if he does something stupid and ends up in jail, I will not bail him out! And I won’t. When you consistently protect your child from consequences, you are delaying their maturity and growth. Not only do they stay dependent on you, they begin to expect—even feel entitled—to such treatment. It’s so very hard to watch your child suffer consequences when your instinct is to rush in and save them! But such consequences are the key to growth and learning. I’ve had to do that with all three of my children, for varying reasons. As tough as it was for me to let them suffer their consequences at times, the two oldest fared well, and the youngest and most difficult, is making strides toward maturity. It’s a long process, maturing, and with a boy, it can continue well into their twenties. Thanks for contributing. I think your message should be required reading here! All the best to you. [/QUOTE]
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Anyone have an older teen/young adult who was diagnosis'd with ODD as a child?
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