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Parent Emeritus
Are all of us divorced or single moms? Is this a factor?
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<blockquote data-quote="Scent of Cedar *" data-source="post: 635605" data-attributes="member: 17461"><p>husband and I have been married 41 years.</p><p></p><p>husband had been married and divorced before I met him.</p><p></p><p>This is my first, and only, marriage.</p><p></p><p>So my question is whether the kids would have done better if we HAD been divorced. </p><p></p><p>There was a time when homosexuality, autism, and schizophrenia (and anxiety disorders) were attributed to defective mothering. </p><p></p><p>Not defective parenting, but defective mothering. </p><p></p><p>Those diagnoses reflected the prejudices of those times.</p><p></p><p>And though people believed the professionals who made these diagnoses, the diagnoses were wrong as could be.</p><p></p><p>So, though we try so hard to make amends for wherever it looks like we might have opened the door for the bad </p><p>things that came next, I don't think we can say for sure why these things happen to us, or to our kids.</p><p></p><p>I do know none of us would find strength and support from one another the way we do if we were not truly horrified at what has happened to the children we loved and the families we created, whether we were able to hold our marriages together, or not.</p><p></p><p>Cedar</p><p></p><p>Echo, you sound great.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Scent of Cedar *, post: 635605, member: 17461"] husband and I have been married 41 years. husband had been married and divorced before I met him. This is my first, and only, marriage. So my question is whether the kids would have done better if we HAD been divorced. There was a time when homosexuality, autism, and schizophrenia (and anxiety disorders) were attributed to defective mothering. Not defective parenting, but defective mothering. Those diagnoses reflected the prejudices of those times. And though people believed the professionals who made these diagnoses, the diagnoses were wrong as could be. So, though we try so hard to make amends for wherever it looks like we might have opened the door for the bad things that came next, I don't think we can say for sure why these things happen to us, or to our kids. I do know none of us would find strength and support from one another the way we do if we were not truly horrified at what has happened to the children we loved and the families we created, whether we were able to hold our marriages together, or not. Cedar Echo, you sound great. [/QUOTE]
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Are all of us divorced or single moms? Is this a factor?
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