I was talking to my sister in law yesterday and a subject came up that I've mentioned to others. I've pretty much gotten the same response from everyone I've talked to and I guess I want some input from some "experts" (you all). I could say that I 100% don't care what people say but obviously that's not true because here I am, asking for input. husband and I adopted difficult child out of foster care when he was 10. He is our only child and we do want more kids. I mentioned that once difficult child is out of the house (or when we at least have a bigger house) we are planning on adopting again. (There are fertility issues that we just don't have the money to go to the next step for treatments to have a baby) We have always wanted to have more than one child, I also want a girl and while we love difficult child, our parenting experience with him hasn't been the best. We don't want this to be our only experience as parents. The next time, we plan on adopting a girl and also one that is as young as we can possibly get. (Also don't have the thousands of dollars needed to adopt an infant) We realize that there is no guarentee that we won't again get a difficult child but as we all know, difficult child's can happen by adoption or birth. Another thing, from our experience with difficult child, we now know what to ask when inquiring about children, how to read between the lines with their descriptions, etc. as our experience with adopting difficult child was filled with complete ignorance on our part. We were absolutely clueless. When someone hears me say these things (and I should say that after getting these reactions, I just don't tell people our plans now) the reactions usually run the way of "You're braver than I am"..."I can't believe you would WANT to do it again"...things like that. Are we totally stupid or selfish for feeling like this? We're not expecting a "perfect" parenting experience, but we just want one that's so called normal. Is that so wrong? I realize that this almost sounds like we'll be shopping and I truly don't mean it that way. We do want more kids and if we can't make them ourselves, there are so many out there that need homes. Also, we do understand the possibility of another difficult child is there as it could happen in any situation and we'll deal with that if it happens. I don't know if any of this makes much sense but I figure if anyone will understand what I'm trying to say it will be you.