Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by Hound dog, Sep 19, 2008.

  1. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    My mother is a piece of work.

    She called me not more than 20 mins ago to tell me she's coming for a visit tomorrow. This is after 11pm my time. She'll be here by 2 or 3pm tomorrow.:mad:

    OMG I hate it when she does this. And it's not just her, she's bringing along an uncle I haven't seen since I married and my sister too........

    And while Nichole and I have been working on the cleaning.......people if you've ever big cleaned, you know the house usually looks like a tornado went off in it before it gets house is a frimpin wreck! *snarl*

    Pardon me while I pound my head into the nearest wall.

    Worst yet. easy child had made plans with me to go to Dayton bright and early in the morning. She's in bed and I can't call her to tell her because she won't hear the phone. She may go, but I've got to stay behind and put this place back together. argh!! :faint: Wouldn't bother me if it was just Mom and sis. I'd tell them to just look the other way or clean it themselves. But my uncle is a different story.

    I know she hasn't gotten to see us in a very long time due to stepdad's illness and death.........but I wish, just once I'd get more than a couple hours notice.

    Someone shoot me. :faint:
  2. everywoman

    everywoman Active Member

    Okay Lisa,
    Here's the plan. Push everything you can in the closets, under the beds, behind the sofa, in the kitchen cabinets, out the back door----Then pray they don't look to close--LOL

    Don't you just hate that!!! Here's hoping that you can get things somewhat in order and enjoy the visit. I'd love to get a call from my grandmother that she was coming to visit again. Of course, I don't think they have phones in heaven.

    Really, forget the little things. Concentrate on what can be seen in the common areas and leave the rest until they leave. Hugs. (If I was close I'd come help.)
  3. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    I think the short notice thing would drive me nuts! One time my mom called and said she had a chance to get a ride down to see us and she would be here in the morning (it was already after 8:00 pm) I was glad the weather was bad and she decided not to come because at that point there was no way I was going to get the house clean.
  4. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    LOL Everwoman that's exactly what I'll be doing.

    Bad enough I hate this sort of cleaning to begin with. But after 2 yrs in school it needs it. And now I'm getting company right smack in the middle of it.

    Mom is desperate to visit. I know and understand that. But she has this wonderful way of forgetting we all have lives over here. Not quite like when you live in the same town and say, oh I think I'll pop in on so and so. (not that I like that either)

    This is way better when she'd just pull into the drive and say I'm here for 2 wks. I put a stop to that when I told her I wouldn't answer the door the next time. lol So now she calls first. I just can't get the can you give me a few days notice thing drummed into her.

    And easy child wonders why I never just walk into her house, and I always call before I come over to make sure it's ok. sheesh!
  5. totoro

    totoro Mom? What's a GFG?

    Blech! I so don't like spur of the moment visits. You are a good daughter... I seriously wouldn't sleep tonight!
    My Dad is coming on Tuesday with his, who knows which wife, and he told me on Monday. I am stressed about this!!! He is staying for about 5 days though.
  6. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    Toto Wow. Five days?? I hope you like the new wife. I'd be a wreck too. And I can empathize with the wife/husband /# what was that again? lol Neither parent has a good track record in that dept.

    This uncle has always been my fav uncle. He even taught me how to drive. So of course I don't want my house a wreck when he visits me for the first time in 25 yrs.

    Just thought of something..........My mom likes to give house tours to anyone who hasn't seen it. Oh crappola! I wonder how much my attic room can hold. lol No seriously........

    I have this lovely old victorian. She loves to show it off. I can't believe I forgot that. That's how I got caught with the ol' shove it in an non main room routine last time.

    My carpets are in desperate need of shampooing. My walls need painted.

    I am not going into panic mode over this. I will clean up. I'll do what I can from 8 am until 2pm and hope it's enough.

    If it's not clean enough, well I probably won't see my uncle for another 25 yrs anyway. Right? :anxious::whiteflag:
  7. gcvmom

    gcvmom Here we go again!

    Next time, just tell her you already have plans ('cuz you really did!) and you won't be home. Insist that she make it for another day.

    by the way, our garage is another favorite stuffing place for junk. We either bag or box it up and in it goes. Of course, I always seem to forget to bring the stuff back in and put it away... that's probably why I can't park a car in there anymore :D
  8. totoro

    totoro Mom? What's a GFG?

    Bake something yummy, that always takes the mind off of clutter! I am sure he won't even care, he will be so excited to see you!!!
    I will be baking Monday night! LOL
  9. Abbey

    Abbey Spork Queen

    I grew up in a 'just pop by' area. I used to vex about whether I had a clean house, pie, coffee, etc. Not anymore. If you pop in, you get what you get.

    The other night mother in law pops in (just uses her key) after I got home from work. There are bird papers, poo, food everywhere. I just let them sit. I just got off 10 hours of work...she can deal with it. Yes, it will be cleaned, but NOT RIGHT NOW.

  10. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    My Dear Lisa,

    You are an adult. You have your own home separate from your mother. You simply do NOT have to be there when she arrives. If she is angry over this, disnegage like you would with a difficult child.

    Lock the doors, have husband lock the doors. Leave a note on the door saying you are sorry but you had plans to be away with easy child and would be more than happy to entertain her with a bit of notice. Or call her tonite (if she can call late so can you) and uninvite her - tell her clearly that she cannot come tomorrow.

    Then GO WITH easy child. And HAVE FUN!

    Once you do it, there will be a blow up. But it will pass, and clearer boundaries will be in place.

    Or you can let her come visit with no notice at a bad time with distant relatives and this will continue for a long time to come.

    You really DO have a choice here sweetie.

  11. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful


    I know I have a choice. And this time I know why she did it this way. My uncle offered to bring her, and she grabbed the chance. Not a chance she would normally get. He lives in W Virginia somewhere/she's in Illinois. And she hasn't had a chance to visit in about 2 yrs. And she's trying to grab a visit before our school year starts on monday and things really get crazy over here.

    I just am irritated she waited so long to call me. If this was arranged between my uncle, sis, and Mom certainly they had to know long before 11pm what they were doing. And I've been here all day. I'd know if they'd called.

  12. crazymama30

    crazymama30 Active Member

    Just remember, they are coming to see you and not check out how clean your house is. As long as there is no mold growing in the carpet, and there are not mice on the kitchen counter, enjoy them. How long are they staying?

    Just do what you can to make it decent. Hang in there. This too shall pass. ( that saying has gotten me though so much.)
  13. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    Hahahahaha! Oh, yeah, she is! And I'll hear about it for 6 months. :rofl: But she forgets her house was always spotless because she had 5 kids cleaning it that way twice a day.
  14. Marcie Mac

    Marcie Mac Just Plain Ole Tired

    Lisa, enjoy the visit with your mom, uncle and sister, and make no apologies for the state of the house. :) Homes have a way of needing cleaning on a constant basis anyway..

  15. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    So for the next six months when seh says something about the house, TELL her it was because she made y'all clean it, and your kids are busy with-other things.

    Enjoy the visit, grab the opportunity to make a memory! Esp now with situation with-stepgfg you KNOW how precious time is. Ignore the dirt and crud.
  16. klmno

    klmno Active Member

    That would really irritate me too.
  17. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    Too True Susie. And after 7 hours of cleaning up clutter I'm done. My floors need mopped badly. House is fairly presentable though, and it will have to do. I'm exhausted. I'm done. No more.

    She's not allowed beyond the kitchen, livingroom and bathroom. :D Dinner will be OUT.

    Top it off I'm in the middle of cleaning the bathroom and my bioDad calls!!! So I'm scrubbing the toilet trying to make polite conversation with a man I haven't talked to in about 3 yrs. He was sweet though. Living with my bro now so will make calling him much easier.

    I asked him if he and bro sicced Mom on me. :rofl:

    Lord I'm tired.
  18. KTMom91

    KTMom91 Well-Known Member

    How about those PODS storage things? Have one delivered to the driveway, shove all the junk into it, lock it up, and enjoy your visit. Later you can sort it out.