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Failure to Thrive
At a Loss and Worried Sick about 22-yr old son
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<blockquote data-quote="RN0441" data-source="post: 744354" data-attributes="member: 15032"><p>Hi</p><p></p><p>Welcome and I'm sorry that you needed to find us.</p><p></p><p>I have to agree with most of what SWOT said. The first thing I would do is definitely would not let your son go back to school and I would let his girlfriend know that you can no longer pay the rent. She can get another roommate. I would be afraid for him to be with her if he is violent with her after drinking and I would not do anything to help them be together.</p><p></p><p>Many will say that you are enabling him by paying the rent when he is NOT doing what he is supposed to do in college.</p><p></p><p>He's depressed. You're worried. I get it. It sucks to be a mom when our kids are going off the rails and we cannot help them and they refuse help. </p><p></p><p>It's not something you can fix. You didn't cause it either. And you know by now you cannot control it.</p><p></p><p>I would find someone to talk to for YOU that specializes in addiction. That is what I did and it helped tremendously.</p><p></p><p>It sounds like your situation will not change. YOU have to be the one to change how you choose to deal with all of this. I am so sorry.</p><p></p><p>If you pray then that is what I'd be doing.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="RN0441, post: 744354, member: 15032"] Hi Welcome and I'm sorry that you needed to find us. I have to agree with most of what SWOT said. The first thing I would do is definitely would not let your son go back to school and I would let his girlfriend know that you can no longer pay the rent. She can get another roommate. I would be afraid for him to be with her if he is violent with her after drinking and I would not do anything to help them be together. Many will say that you are enabling him by paying the rent when he is NOT doing what he is supposed to do in college. He's depressed. You're worried. I get it. It sucks to be a mom when our kids are going off the rails and we cannot help them and they refuse help. It's not something you can fix. You didn't cause it either. And you know by now you cannot control it. I would find someone to talk to for YOU that specializes in addiction. That is what I did and it helped tremendously. It sounds like your situation will not change. YOU have to be the one to change how you choose to deal with all of this. I am so sorry. If you pray then that is what I'd be doing. [/QUOTE]
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Failure to Thrive
At a Loss and Worried Sick about 22-yr old son
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