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Substance Abuse
At my Wits end - sorry I've not been here!
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 712258" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>If you give him s home he will have more money, which he will get illegally, and buy more drugs. It is likely more than weed. And his living in your home will be hell. You know this</p><p></p><p>We have choices, like our adult children. We can read their social media, emails etc knowing we cant do anything about them or we can let go of their life coices with love and let them be. He stole the iphone, of course. Drug users/addicts lie, steal, sell drugs, rarely work in legal jobs even if they pretend to look and are not currently nice people who can be reasoned with. Addiction is a mindset of its own and only they can stop it and actions speak louder than words. Words from drug addicts lips or fingers are useless. Look at actions only, not promises.</p><p></p><p>Many of us are addicted to our adult children as much as they are addicted to drugs. Just like they do nothing but find ways to buy and then use, many parents do nothing but think about how we can help/fix our adult sons and daughters. No good comes from drugs and nothing positive comes from our addiction to fixing these adult drug users who our grown children have become.</p><p></p><p>I strongly suggest breaking your addiction to your son's activities so maybe he can break his addiction to drugs. Your son is ruining two lives, his and yours. Do you want to go down with him? You cant change him and will never know what is true or false from his words. So whats the point? You are worth more than that.</p><p></p><p>I sincerely hope you get therapy or try Al Anon to see that you can let go and have a good life in spite of your son. He is not you. You are not him. And he is not 6 year olds so you cant control him, wipe his nose and make it better. We are powerless over others no matter how hard we deny it.</p><p></p><p>Its mot about what we do or dont do for them. Its about what they do or dont decide to do for themselves. There may be or may not be a good outcome. At any rate, the only director of your sons play is himself. in my opinion use all your willpower and stay off his social media. And get therapy. ASAP. We here on this forum can support you but none of us can take the place of face time support. So many of us benefit from it.</p><p> </p><p>Love and light and try to resist sons social media.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 712258, member: 1550"] If you give him s home he will have more money, which he will get illegally, and buy more drugs. It is likely more than weed. And his living in your home will be hell. You know this We have choices, like our adult children. We can read their social media, emails etc knowing we cant do anything about them or we can let go of their life coices with love and let them be. He stole the iphone, of course. Drug users/addicts lie, steal, sell drugs, rarely work in legal jobs even if they pretend to look and are not currently nice people who can be reasoned with. Addiction is a mindset of its own and only they can stop it and actions speak louder than words. Words from drug addicts lips or fingers are useless. Look at actions only, not promises. Many of us are addicted to our adult children as much as they are addicted to drugs. Just like they do nothing but find ways to buy and then use, many parents do nothing but think about how we can help/fix our adult sons and daughters. No good comes from drugs and nothing positive comes from our addiction to fixing these adult drug users who our grown children have become. I strongly suggest breaking your addiction to your son's activities so maybe he can break his addiction to drugs. Your son is ruining two lives, his and yours. Do you want to go down with him? You cant change him and will never know what is true or false from his words. So whats the point? You are worth more than that. I sincerely hope you get therapy or try Al Anon to see that you can let go and have a good life in spite of your son. He is not you. You are not him. And he is not 6 year olds so you cant control him, wipe his nose and make it better. We are powerless over others no matter how hard we deny it. Its mot about what we do or dont do for them. Its about what they do or dont decide to do for themselves. There may be or may not be a good outcome. At any rate, the only director of your sons play is himself. in my opinion use all your willpower and stay off his social media. And get therapy. ASAP. We here on this forum can support you but none of us can take the place of face time support. So many of us benefit from it. Love and light and try to resist sons social media. [/QUOTE]
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