Marguerite
Active Member
When easy child 2/difficult child 2 was going through a serious anxiety period, she saw a psychiatrist who strongly advised her to never have children. "You have ADD, your husband has dyslexia, you have brothers with autism, you have too high a risk ogf having a child with problems."
It was not what easy child 2/difficult child 2 needed to hear. She told the doctor that she has a better chance of being able to help such a child because she has personal experience.
BG3 is now just on a year old. I have had a few niggly concerns - BG3's favourite game is to flip objects along on the ground with the back of his hand. He will crawl after them and flip again. Or he will take an object to different floor surfaces and drop the object repeatedly. Drop, pick up. Drop again, pick up. He listens to the sound it makes. His favourite toy right now is a partly deflated balloon. He will grab a handful of it and let it spring form his hand. he giggles when he sees the balloon, as if it is inviting him for a game. He's a happy kid, he makes good eye contact (but so did difficult child 3). He does like spinning the wheels on toy cars. We have a toy car that makes noises when it rolls along, but he often bats at it to send it flying, then crawls after it like he does with his balls. An activity wll he plays with has a large captured ball and he will stand there spinning the ball.
He's able to concentrate well for ages on one thing he's playing with. He also will keep going back to one place and do the same thing over and over. Tonight he was taking a rattle to the TV table and throwing the rattle onto the TV table, then flipping it until it fell down. Over and over. We kept moving him, trying to get him to find another table to do it on, but it had to be the TV table. He couldn't be distracted from it. I finally took the rattle to another room.
Language - he says "mum, mum" and "dad, dad" but not really in response to mum or dad. No words yet. he seems to understand, he responds to his own name (which difficult child 3 didn't do at this age, but difficult child 1 did). He responds to hand signals and verbal instructions. he recognises certain words, sounds and actions. He responds with certain actions to indicate what he wants. For example, when he's had enough to eat he pushes your hand away with the back of his hand, and tries to pull off his bib. So he is communicating, he recognises that there are ways to get in touch with other people even if it's just actions.
I'm still wondering if I'm seeing Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD), high-functioning. It's early days, but if there is a problem, then early intervention is best. He does interact well with his parents, but in his own way. he tries to initiate a game by coming up to you and making a particular sound, his 'game laugh'. He was doing that this evening to mother in law and he clearly wanted her to get out of her chair and chase him (not possible). He kept coming back to her and trying to initiate a chase game.
My kids used to say I see autism under every rock. I said that was because I had a lot of exposure to it and experience with it, and I was rarely wrong. And now my boys especially will 'pick' autism in someone else. At BG3's birthday party we were in a local park and a young man came along to talk to difficult child 1. the young man's mother was with him and she told me quietly that her son has Asperger's. I got difficult child 3 to come over and talk to him, but neither boy was able to maintain conversation for more than a few minutes. I said to difficult child 3 later, "That young man has Asperger's, I thought it might help to talk to him."
difficult child 3 said, "Yes, it was obvious that he's Aspie. he seemed a nice guy." But no further interest in associating. Both loners.
As for BG3 - it's the repeated, over and over, flipping of balls and other objects that has me increasingly concerned. He's happy enough, and an easy kid. Not quite as easy as BG2 (who we don't see often enough). BG2 seems to play differently. More laid-back, more adaptable.
Am I crazy or over-concerned? Or am I seeing early warning signs? After what the shrink said to easy child 2/difficult child 2, I don't want to say anything to her too soon or she'll shut down about it and won't get it investigated. But if there' a problem, I don't want it left too long before we get help.
Marg
It was not what easy child 2/difficult child 2 needed to hear. She told the doctor that she has a better chance of being able to help such a child because she has personal experience.
BG3 is now just on a year old. I have had a few niggly concerns - BG3's favourite game is to flip objects along on the ground with the back of his hand. He will crawl after them and flip again. Or he will take an object to different floor surfaces and drop the object repeatedly. Drop, pick up. Drop again, pick up. He listens to the sound it makes. His favourite toy right now is a partly deflated balloon. He will grab a handful of it and let it spring form his hand. he giggles when he sees the balloon, as if it is inviting him for a game. He's a happy kid, he makes good eye contact (but so did difficult child 3). He does like spinning the wheels on toy cars. We have a toy car that makes noises when it rolls along, but he often bats at it to send it flying, then crawls after it like he does with his balls. An activity wll he plays with has a large captured ball and he will stand there spinning the ball.
He's able to concentrate well for ages on one thing he's playing with. He also will keep going back to one place and do the same thing over and over. Tonight he was taking a rattle to the TV table and throwing the rattle onto the TV table, then flipping it until it fell down. Over and over. We kept moving him, trying to get him to find another table to do it on, but it had to be the TV table. He couldn't be distracted from it. I finally took the rattle to another room.
Language - he says "mum, mum" and "dad, dad" but not really in response to mum or dad. No words yet. he seems to understand, he responds to his own name (which difficult child 3 didn't do at this age, but difficult child 1 did). He responds to hand signals and verbal instructions. he recognises certain words, sounds and actions. He responds with certain actions to indicate what he wants. For example, when he's had enough to eat he pushes your hand away with the back of his hand, and tries to pull off his bib. So he is communicating, he recognises that there are ways to get in touch with other people even if it's just actions.
I'm still wondering if I'm seeing Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD), high-functioning. It's early days, but if there is a problem, then early intervention is best. He does interact well with his parents, but in his own way. he tries to initiate a game by coming up to you and making a particular sound, his 'game laugh'. He was doing that this evening to mother in law and he clearly wanted her to get out of her chair and chase him (not possible). He kept coming back to her and trying to initiate a chase game.
My kids used to say I see autism under every rock. I said that was because I had a lot of exposure to it and experience with it, and I was rarely wrong. And now my boys especially will 'pick' autism in someone else. At BG3's birthday party we were in a local park and a young man came along to talk to difficult child 1. the young man's mother was with him and she told me quietly that her son has Asperger's. I got difficult child 3 to come over and talk to him, but neither boy was able to maintain conversation for more than a few minutes. I said to difficult child 3 later, "That young man has Asperger's, I thought it might help to talk to him."
difficult child 3 said, "Yes, it was obvious that he's Aspie. he seemed a nice guy." But no further interest in associating. Both loners.
As for BG3 - it's the repeated, over and over, flipping of balls and other objects that has me increasingly concerned. He's happy enough, and an easy kid. Not quite as easy as BG2 (who we don't see often enough). BG2 seems to play differently. More laid-back, more adaptable.
Am I crazy or over-concerned? Or am I seeing early warning signs? After what the shrink said to easy child 2/difficult child 2, I don't want to say anything to her too soon or she'll shut down about it and won't get it investigated. But if there' a problem, I don't want it left too long before we get help.
Marg