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Awful weekend - Update
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<blockquote data-quote="Marguerite" data-source="post: 35985" data-attributes="member: 1991"><p>Unfortunately, your sister is legally in the right. It IS a shame, but she really doesn't have to consider you in this at all.</p><p></p><p>The thing is, you both need to stay on good terms with each other. And surely, when the house IS sold, you will get some money to help you with some sort of housing? Maybe she's afraid that you don't intend to sell it, ever. Family can sometimes get quite panicky (and therefore unreasonable) when money is involved. There is the fear that family members will presume on the ties of blood.</p><p></p><p>husband's father was in a similar situation. husband's father had two brothers. One lived in the old family home, because he'd been the one living there to look after their invalid mother. When she went to a nursing home it was this brother who was always visiting her, fetching things. of course husband's father and other uncle visited their mother a lot too, but this sense of responsibility always seemed to lie with this oldest brother.</p><p>When she died, the oldest brother continues to live in this house although it was owned by all three equally. They could have forced the sale of the house but chose not to. But then, the two younger brothers had each other to bounce ideas off, they felt less anxious about the whole situation. They came to an arrangement with their brother which would give them some sense of financial security, as well as give him continued residence. While he lived there he continued to be responsible for the maintenance of the house and to pay all utilities. But it took constant hard work to maintain good relations between them and not let the issue of the house come between them. I know that in almost all other families, the old man would have been forced to sell, and would then have gone to a nursing home. I suspect a big reason they were prepared to wait, was they knew they wouldn't have to wait very long - he had advanced emphysema and wasn't looking after himself. He only lived four years past his mother.</p><p></p><p>The old house is now long gone - bulldozed for housing development and a road.</p><p></p><p>Marg</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Marguerite, post: 35985, member: 1991"] Unfortunately, your sister is legally in the right. It IS a shame, but she really doesn't have to consider you in this at all. The thing is, you both need to stay on good terms with each other. And surely, when the house IS sold, you will get some money to help you with some sort of housing? Maybe she's afraid that you don't intend to sell it, ever. Family can sometimes get quite panicky (and therefore unreasonable) when money is involved. There is the fear that family members will presume on the ties of blood. husband's father was in a similar situation. husband's father had two brothers. One lived in the old family home, because he'd been the one living there to look after their invalid mother. When she went to a nursing home it was this brother who was always visiting her, fetching things. of course husband's father and other uncle visited their mother a lot too, but this sense of responsibility always seemed to lie with this oldest brother. When she died, the oldest brother continues to live in this house although it was owned by all three equally. They could have forced the sale of the house but chose not to. But then, the two younger brothers had each other to bounce ideas off, they felt less anxious about the whole situation. They came to an arrangement with their brother which would give them some sense of financial security, as well as give him continued residence. While he lived there he continued to be responsible for the maintenance of the house and to pay all utilities. But it took constant hard work to maintain good relations between them and not let the issue of the house come between them. I know that in almost all other families, the old man would have been forced to sell, and would then have gone to a nursing home. I suspect a big reason they were prepared to wait, was they knew they wouldn't have to wait very long - he had advanced emphysema and wasn't looking after himself. He only lived four years past his mother. The old house is now long gone - bulldozed for housing development and a road. Marg [/QUOTE]
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