B’s social worker at the treatment centre called and brought up the cards he’s obsessed over. These cards were removed from our home when he assaulted a teacher at school and suspended because she didn’t have time to look at his card. They’ve been banned. Anyways, they give out reward points and B picked the cards knowing he’s not allowed to have them. I told household staff no cards. Then the psychologist called me and tried to convince me to let him have them, I told her no. Then I told the social worker two weeks ago no. I am traumatized over these cards. This week she brings them up again because they as a group (all the doctors) believe we should allow him to keep them. Tried explaining that I’m having a hard time with him coming back, having to go back to the screaming and swearing and they want to add these cards? Again she presses that they want to develop a plan for him to keep these cards. Those cards are honestly the one thing we do not want to budge on. B is going to come home, I’m going to take them away and he’ll hate/target me even more. Something I have expressed to them. He was able to leave school last week and go back to the house to ensure the cards were all still there. cause in real life, this will be possible. They did this because he was upset his backpack was open and thought he lost his stuff. They stressed the fact that he needs to learn how to deal with the cards. That he may go to a friends birthday party and get them as thank you gifts-except he doesn’t have friends nor is he ever invited to parties. So I doubt will actually happen. And they said he’ll see them at school and other kids have them. (I wanted Nike’s and a cell phone growing up but we don’t always get what we want). But here I am, waking up multiple times a night thinking about getting him to school without these cards. Life will be impossible with them around. I’m a pretty flexible person, I’m willing to compromise but those cards..... those cards made our lives HELL. He hit his little brother many times because B left them lying around the house. He was 3, they pick up stuff. I don’t know what to do. B comes home in two weeks full time whether I’m ready or not. The thought is making me ill. I’m seriously considering signing over my rights and putting him in care. Which also breaks my heart. After all, he’s still so young (10). Hubby and I aren’t doing the best right now. He asked me if I’m only with him because of the kids..... I couldn’t answer that because I’m not sure anymore. He’s my best friend, but am I in love with him still? I don’t know, I’m not even sure who I am anymore. How can I possibly love someone while being so lost on the inside. Anyways thank you for listening to me vent.