BA drags difficult child II on errands?

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by amazeofgrace, Jun 17, 2008.

  1. amazeofgrace

    amazeofgrace New Member

    So The behavioral assistant came today and took difficult child II over 40 minutes away to a far far away town to run errands and drop something off? I am not sure how to feel about this. They were gone over 3 hours and he did call to say they were stuck on the Parkway? in traffic, which was my 1st clue that they did not stay local. It's a free state provided service, but I can not help but ? the professionalism and safety of the BA's judgement in doing this, he did not even ask me. He's married with kids and I do not want to get the guy fired, but???

    On top of that he told difficult child II I should tell him when his appts are, when difficult child II's behavior plan cearly states there is a huge calendar on the fridge listing all of difficult child II's appts so there is never a surprise (big big issue for difficult child II), difficult child II came home and ripped it off the fridge, and arrogantly tells me I have to "tell" him when his appts are from now on, grrrr hissss:mad:
  2. Sara PA

    Sara PA New Member

    Explain to me what this guy's job is and what he's suppose to be doing with and for your son. What qualifications does someone need to get this job?

    I wouldn't hesitate to call and question the appropriateness of the road trip or his contradicting the behavioral plan. Unless they're looking for one more thing to fire him over, his job won't be jeapordized. But you might be able to get him transferred to another client.
  3. SRL

    SRL Active Member

    What Sara said.
  4. SRL

    SRL Active Member

    And I should add that I'd love it if someone paid me to do my errands.
  5. Sara PA

    Sara PA New Member

    What SRL said.
  6. klmno

    klmno Active Member

    I can only say that this would bother me, too. difficult child was supposed to be "assigned" a mentor a couple of years ago. This guy, who I'd never met, called me out of the blue and said he would be letting me know when he would be picking difficult child up and "taking him out" for outings. I didn't sign up for this and had no idea what credentials, if any, this guy had and difficult child was 11 and very impressionable, vulnerable, and desparate for male attention.

    I called the PO and said, "No, I don't think I am comfortable with this." No way, no how.

    Of course, we don't always have that option, but I would follow your instincts on this one. in my humble opinion.
  7. totoro

    totoro Mom? What's a GFG?

    Nervous Nelly here. As a person who has been the victim one to many times of some schmucks sexual abuse... I would be scared for more than one reason. But, maybe I am a bit too paranoid? I am afraid for either of the girls to be alone with anyone.
    And yes I would like to be paid for my errands as well.
  8. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    What Sara and Totoro said.

  9. Andy

    Andy Active Member

    Do you get a treatment plan from the BA listing goals and objectives for difficult child II? What is he working on with difficult child II? I wouldn't hesitate to call his supervisor and ask what the policy and procedure is for taking a child out of the "work zone" of your home. I would also ask the supervisor for the medical report for that day. What did BA record as to what was accomplished? Does it state difficult child II was taken out of town without mom's knowledge? Ask why you as the parent was not informed of difficult child II's whereabout.

    I agree that BA also needs to be confronted about difficult child II's schedule. BA should have looked into what currently was happening before discussing with difficult child II. BA should have been encouraging difficult child II to follow the calendar. Is it possible that difficult child II may have mentioned that he would like you to tell him about the appointments and instead of asking how he gets the info, BA agreed that that would work? Anyway, it was not handled right.

    I know I would feel scared about this one.
  10. Christy

    Christy New Member

    I agree with Adrianne. Was there a reason for the outing? How did it fit in with the treatment plan. For my difficult child, I could see running errands as an opportunity to work on a variety of social and behavioral skills but I would not think it appropriate to take him out of town without permission. Did you ask the BA why they went so far away and what was the learning goal of the outing? I would definitely ask for this infromation.
  11. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Ok...before you get completely in a tizzy...Cory had a tech which I am assuming is basically the same as your BA for years. They were with him in the school and the community. It was inevitable that at some point this person would have my son with them when they would be out in the community and have to drop something off somewhere or pick something up. It wasnt a problem for me. It gave Cory time to work on his community skills like not stealing from stores!

    I dont know what to think about the calendar on the fridge.
  12. totoro

    totoro Mom? What's a GFG?

    I agree about the socialization and independance , but the guy here does it in a group... and they go to the park and discuss scenerios first, then gradually work to go to other more difficult places. And they tell the parents the plan...
  13. busywend

    busywend Well-Known Member Staff Member

    How old is difficult child II? Can you add that to your profile?

    I would be furious - it is not right to drive him anywhere you do not know the specifics of before hand. And him telling difficult child that you should be reminding him (depending on difficult child IIs age - which is why I asked) is totally inappropriate as well.
  14. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    Reeks of inappropriateness. I know somebody who was sexually abused this way.
    Never let that guy around your child again.
    And report him.
  15. amazeofgrace

    amazeofgrace New Member

    welp apparantly you only need a 2 year degree in "anything" to be a BA in NJ, he has a 2 year degree in police enforcement from Egypt. He seems nice, but again his focus is everywhere.

    He is supposed Occupational Therapist (OT) be going according to our in home therapists behavior plan, but she has yet to catch him to go over it with him.

    Sigh..... It will come up at the "team" meeting 2morrow. I emailed the in home about it and she will most likely share my concerns.
  16. Christy

    Christy New Member

    Are you part of the team meeting? I would hope so! Be sure that everyone is clear on the goals and whatever the BA is doing is cleared with you first and is part of the plan.