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<blockquote data-quote="Mirabelle" data-source="post: 762096" data-attributes="member: 28712"><p>Thank you Nandina. I was reading another post in which a son was described as 'highly intelligent but a slow learner.' This describes my stepson precisely. It is very hard to enforce boundaries with him; not that we are not good at enforcing them (we are), but that every time he is reminded of a condition or rule, he behaves as though he has never heard it before and proceeds to complain / tantrum accordingly. It is exasperating and maddening but we hold the line. I don't know if this is part of his illness - that he has trouble retaining information - or if he is attempting to manipulate us and wear us down (quite possibly both.) We have had several early morning knocks on our door over the last few years, him having had a fight with his mom and expecting us to just let him stay with us regardless of what came before. This being after he left voluntarily or was kicked out of our home three times for refusing to follow rules. To his way of thinking that is all hypothetical; if he <strong>actually</strong> finds himself homeless he says we are obligated to take him in because we are his parents........to steal our things, drink our liquor, wreck our house, leave our animals outside etc.</p><p></p><p>All this to say, upon reflection and reading your response and those of others to my post, I realize I am overestimating my stepson's level of self control and basic decency at this point. I so appreciate the different perspectives offered on this site. </p><p></p><p>Hugs to you too.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Mirabelle, post: 762096, member: 28712"] Thank you Nandina. I was reading another post in which a son was described as 'highly intelligent but a slow learner.' This describes my stepson precisely. It is very hard to enforce boundaries with him; not that we are not good at enforcing them (we are), but that every time he is reminded of a condition or rule, he behaves as though he has never heard it before and proceeds to complain / tantrum accordingly. It is exasperating and maddening but we hold the line. I don't know if this is part of his illness - that he has trouble retaining information - or if he is attempting to manipulate us and wear us down (quite possibly both.) We have had several early morning knocks on our door over the last few years, him having had a fight with his mom and expecting us to just let him stay with us regardless of what came before. This being after he left voluntarily or was kicked out of our home three times for refusing to follow rules. To his way of thinking that is all hypothetical; if he [B]actually[/B] finds himself homeless he says we are obligated to take him in because we are his parents........to steal our things, drink our liquor, wreck our house, leave our animals outside etc. All this to say, upon reflection and reading your response and those of others to my post, I realize I am overestimating my stepson's level of self control and basic decency at this point. I so appreciate the different perspectives offered on this site. Hugs to you too. [/QUOTE]
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