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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 661622" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>Sherril, I do not have a child who has been locked up, but my son is in distress and struggling and keeps making the same mistakes over and over again. I despair that he will ever learn, and cannot bear seeing him suffer.</p><p></p><p>I am on the same roller coaster as you are. I see that the only way I can survive this is changing myself. Somehow modifying in some way the link between the way I feel and his state of mind and affairs. When they are babies this is adaptive and protective. When they are adults, not so much.</p><p></p><p>I can see why so many Mothers turn to Buddhism and other spiritual practices.</p><p></p><p>I asked the older men what had changed for them. They answered that they had tired of going back and forth to prison, that it took too much of a toll. It was no longer fun to them, living as they had. They stopped.</p><p></p><p>Take care of yourself. Let us know how you are.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 661622, member: 18958"] Sherril, I do not have a child who has been locked up, but my son is in distress and struggling and keeps making the same mistakes over and over again. I despair that he will ever learn, and cannot bear seeing him suffer. I am on the same roller coaster as you are. I see that the only way I can survive this is changing myself. Somehow modifying in some way the link between the way I feel and his state of mind and affairs. When they are babies this is adaptive and protective. When they are adults, not so much. I can see why so many Mothers turn to Buddhism and other spiritual practices. I asked the older men what had changed for them. They answered that they had tired of going back and forth to prison, that it took too much of a toll. It was no longer fun to them, living as they had. They stopped. Take care of yourself. Let us know how you are. [/QUOTE]
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