Bad Afternoon :(

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by JKF, Jun 17, 2013.

  1. JKF

    JKF Well-Known Member

    I'm so frustrated today! When easy child/difficult child plays outside he often takes off without telling me where he's going. I have told him more than once not to do that and that he needs to either stay where I can see him OR specifically tell me where he'll be. No matter how many times I tell him this he doesn't do either. He takes off and I wind up having to go calling and looking for him.

    So today, before he went to ride bikes with the girl down the street I reminded him of the rules and told him he will either follow them or he will come inside immediately and be grounded to his room for the remainder of the day.

    At first they stayed by the house and all was well. I decided to take a quick swim and while I was doing that I looked up and saw only the girl riding her bike. easy child/difficult child was nowhere in sight even though his bike was out front. My husband searched the house and I got out of the pool and we both called his name. Apparently he was playing alone at the girls house while she was up by our house riding bikes. No way is that ok. She went and told him we were looking for him and he came running home acting like he did nothing wrong. I screamed at him outside and sent him in. I'm sure my neighbors think I'm a lunatic but oh f'ing well.

    And to top it all off, the girl tried to be nice and bring his helmet back bc he left it there. As she was doing so she dropped it and backed over it by mistake and broke it. She also got her fingers caught in her spokes while trying to pick it up and may now have a broken finger. Ugggggh!

    So easy child/difficult child is in bed, his friend got hurt, our neighbors think we're freaks and husband and I are aggravated beyond all belief! What a horrible afternoon!
    Last edited: Jun 17, 2013
  2. DDD

    DDD Well-Known Member

    I NEVER found the answer for this problem but GFGmom disappeared very very often and I was a very very diligent parent...with her two older siblings helping me. Most often she disappeared after dinner and as darkness fell. Sure wish I could give you some great advice. Sorry 'bout that. Those of you who are old enough to remember who Bob Greise was (star QB for the Miami Dolphins) I can assure you that he and his wife somehow didn't "get" that a young female neighbor should not be welcomed in to watch TV after dark. SIGH! Nice neighbors but I can still "feel" the embarrassment of searching for GFGmom door to door as the older kids rode bikes calling her name and riding on the golfcourse looking for her...sometimes she hid in those trees! You have my TOTAL sympathy. Hugs DDD
  3. Signorina

    Signorina Guest

    We've all had days like that... Good news is that tomorrow starts another day.

    Hope your evening is calmer!
  4. JKF

    JKF Well-Known Member

    I'm very diligent too DDD and sometimes I actually have to force myself to back off a bit and give him more freedom. But it seems like unless I'm on him constantly he always makes the wrong choices. Always! It's so frustrating. He's a good kid but can be impulsive and is starting to be sneaky about things. He knew I was in the pool so he used that moment to his advantage to sneak off. Well now he's in bed for the evening. He knew the rules and the consequences and he chose to do what he wanted anyway. So bed it is. I just hope the girl didn't break her finger. I will feel really bad bc tomorrow's the last day of school and she's really big into martial arts, etc.

    easy child/difficult child keeps saying it's not his fault she got hurt. I calmly explained to him that no - he didn't purposely hurt her but by not following the rules and taking off he inadvertently contributed to her accident. If he hadn't been there when he wasn't supposed to be, he wouldn't have left his helmet and she wouldn't have had to bring it back to him. I told him it's like a domino effect. One bad decision can set off a chain of events and sometimes people get hurt along the way. That really seems to have sunk in with him.

    And yes Signorina. Tomorrow is definitely a new day. Thanks for the reminder. Sometimes I get so caught up in the moment that I forget to remember that it's just that - one moment in time.