I got a call from friend tonight and it was kinda like desav for me. He had to tell his 2 oldest kids that their mother was murdered. I tried to be strong and help but my mind flooded with memiores of when I had to tell my son that his father was murdered and the tears flowed, And I had to get off the phone. I feel bad that I couldn't help my friend when he needed me the most. It will be 2 years in november sence the love of my life and my sons father was murdered, I had been doing good up until tonight. althrough I know I'm not I feel weak, because I wasn't able to control the uncontrolable. I know it may sound crazy, But I didn't want to cry like again like over it. Not that it doesn't still hurt I just don't want to give the person who did it the happiness in knowing of my saddiness, Is that wrong to feel that way.