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Be careful about student loans
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<blockquote data-quote="Tanya M" data-source="post: 702393" data-attributes="member: 18516"><p>Welcome Indy,</p><p></p><p>Your story is a familiar one. I'm so sorry you have to endure her outrageous behavior. You do not deserve the treatment she is giving you and to keep your granddaughter from you is just cruel.</p><p></p><p></p><p>Yes, I know this feeling well. It didn't matter how much we did for our son it was never good enough. My son has screamed to my face that I was the worst mother ever. It used to really bother me but I made a choice several years ago to take my life back. I was not a perfect parent and quite frankly there is no such thing. All parents make mistakes. I did the best I could. We gave our son a stable home - mom and dad both working - dinner every night as a family - went to church, etc....... My son had a good childhood, I know this and will not buy into him trying to convince me otherwise. He can believe what he wants, I know the truth.</p><p></p><p></p><p>She is making a very poor decision in marrying a man that has abused her. It is my guess that she will grow tired of living in this kind of relationship and will probably reach out to you at some point. It's pretty common with our difficult adult kids that they want nothing to do with us until the floor drops out from under them, then suddenly they "need" us.</p><p></p><p></p><p>Forgiveness is not for your daughter, it's for you. I learned a long time ago that I needed to forgive my son for all the chaos he caused in my life. I no longer wanted to hold that bitterness in my heart. Forgiveness does not mean that I have forgotten nor does it mean that I trust my son. </p><p></p><p>As for the student loan thing, I too took on my son's student loan debt. I didn't want him to have poor credit. What was I thinking!<img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/emoticons/crazy2.gif" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":crazy2:" title="crazy :crazy2:" data-shortname=":crazy2:" /></p><p>The bank of mom and dad is permanently closed!</p><p></p><p>Hang in there. I'm glad you found us here, it's a great place to vent without any judgment.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Tanya M, post: 702393, member: 18516"] Welcome Indy, Your story is a familiar one. I'm so sorry you have to endure her outrageous behavior. You do not deserve the treatment she is giving you and to keep your granddaughter from you is just cruel. Yes, I know this feeling well. It didn't matter how much we did for our son it was never good enough. My son has screamed to my face that I was the worst mother ever. It used to really bother me but I made a choice several years ago to take my life back. I was not a perfect parent and quite frankly there is no such thing. All parents make mistakes. I did the best I could. We gave our son a stable home - mom and dad both working - dinner every night as a family - went to church, etc....... My son had a good childhood, I know this and will not buy into him trying to convince me otherwise. He can believe what he wants, I know the truth. She is making a very poor decision in marrying a man that has abused her. It is my guess that she will grow tired of living in this kind of relationship and will probably reach out to you at some point. It's pretty common with our difficult adult kids that they want nothing to do with us until the floor drops out from under them, then suddenly they "need" us. Forgiveness is not for your daughter, it's for you. I learned a long time ago that I needed to forgive my son for all the chaos he caused in my life. I no longer wanted to hold that bitterness in my heart. Forgiveness does not mean that I have forgotten nor does it mean that I trust my son. As for the student loan thing, I too took on my son's student loan debt. I didn't want him to have poor credit. What was I thinking!:crazy2: The bank of mom and dad is permanently closed! Hang in there. I'm glad you found us here, it's a great place to vent without any judgment. [/QUOTE]
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