Bedwetting "Accidents"

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by ML, Jan 27, 2009.

  1. ML

    ML Guest

    Manster occasionally wets the bed, maybe once every couple of months. He never does when I make sure that he goes potty before bed but I’ve gotten out of the habit of reminding him. He had an accident last night. I didn’t make a big deal of it. husband seems concerned. I told husband “I have enough to worry about and don’t want to add this to my list”. At least he’s not mean to animals and doesn’t start fires! husband feels that he’s too old even for an occasional accident. Should I worry? Or should I just add it to the list of things on his nighttime list in the bathroom (bath: broken down by body parts lol, teeth, pjs).
  2. aeroeng

    aeroeng Mom of Three

    I don't think it is worth adding it to the list of problems. The more of an issue you make of it the harder it will be for him to control it. I would put a plastic sheet down under his bed sheets and teach him how to do the laundry. Make it his responsibility and let it go. Waking up in wet sheets is uncomfortable. He is already motivated to stop. Any pressure from you will only make him frustrated.

    You could tell him that it is also his responsibility to remember to go before bed time. Maybe get an alarm clock to go off just before bed so he is reminded without you participation.
  3. smallworld

    smallworld Moderator

    He is not too old to be having accidents. Some kids have them much later than manster. If having him go to the bathroom before bed helps, then by all means make it part of the bedtime routine.
  4. gcvmom

    gcvmom Here we go again!

    I wouldn't worry at all. If he's growing especially, it could just be a matter of him sleeping more deeply. If it becomes a chronic thing after having NOT been an issue for a while, then I'd pay it some notice.

    FWIW, I have an almost 10yo who STILL wets the bed nightly. We're looking into an alarm because we've already tried limiting fluids, getting her up at midnight, DDAVP, and even Lexapro ('cuz she was fine for a few years and then started up during a hugely stressful time in our family), but none of it has worked. (Infection etc. has been ruled out).
  5. Janna

    Janna New Member

    Dylan still wets the bed, and he turned 12 in September. It's not a daily thing, as he gets older, it slows down and becomes more sporatic.

    I'd make sure it's not something big (i.e. bladder infection), but if not, it's not a big deal. Just make sure he goes before bed.
  6. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    ML, it doesn't sound like it happens that often, so I would just have him clean his own sheets and go on with-life.

    My difficult child still wets the bed about every 4 nights. I read that many Aspies have bladder and colon issues, related to allergies. We're on his 4th mattress now.

    Wish I had a magic cure.
  7. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    Lots of kids, especially boys, have weaker bladders and wet in their sleep. My oldest did it until he was twelve. It embarassed him, so I never mentioned it. The doctor said he couldn't help it and that was that.
    Definitely I'd put that low on the list. It will stop one day. Certain medications can cause bedwetting. My son wet his bed every day he was on LIthium and stopped the minute he was weaned off.
  8. Nancy423

    Nancy423 do I have to be the mom?

    my nephew slept so deeply that he didn't wake up when the urge was there. They eventually went from pull-ups to a program (expensive) that would sound an alarm when it felt wetness. It worked for him and he's been dry since. He must have been around the same age too (9-10 yrs) He's not taking any medications and doesn't have any other health/mental issues (other than being a typical teen!!)

    Oh and he was tested to see if he had any infections too....that was ruled out before they went in the program.
  9. ML

    ML Guest

    Thanks everyone, the perspective helps.

    Terry that colon and bladder thing is interesting. I knew about the colon and allergies but didn't realize the bladder could also be involved. I'll have to look more into that.
  10. Numina

    Numina New Member

    He's wrong.

    You are right.

    I think our kids have enough to deal with without us making up problems.
  11. klmno

    klmno Active Member

    ML- I just saw this- I guess I missed it before being so wrapped up in other things. I think you are right in your approach. Hang in there- be true to yourself and Manster first- your momma gut is usually right!! ((HUGS))
  12. Marguerite

    Marguerite Active Member

    I can't add anything else, except to suggest, from our experience -
    don't use plastic sheet on the mattress, use vinyl instead. It doesn't rustle, it is heavy enough to stay in place, it feels more comfortableand you're less likely to have sensory issues causing more troubles. The vinyl sheet can be washed, can be put on the clothes line - it worked well for us.

  13. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    difficult child is 11. He consistently wet the bed nightly through 9 years of age. He seldom has accidents any more but does occasionally. We just tell him to hop in the shower and don't make a big deal of it. I remember a nephew who had problems through the age of 13.

    Definitely you are handling it right by not making a big deal of it!
  14. My difficult child is 8. He'll be fine for long periods and then have a series of accidents. I have noticed there is a strong correlation between his accidents and his general behavior. When he starts to have behavior issues, he's stressed, he gets exhausted, and I think he then just sleeps so deeply, he doesn't feel his body's cues. It's a vicious cycle. He is unhappy that he wet the bed and that adds to his stress. We never punish him for it or express disappointment -- we're very matter of fact about it because he simply can't help it -- but he knows most people have stopped wetting the bed by his age and doesn't really understand why he hasn't. Good luck.