That's me. I love mother in law. I care a great deal about her happiness. But the woman is driving me nuts. I can't go a day without her calling and needing/wanting something. And maybe that wouldn't be so darn bad if these needs/wants weren't always immediate. It's like she's suddenly forgotten that I have a family, house, and school to attend to other than her. She's become so needy of late that I'm starting to dread when the phone rings. Lord help us if we skip a day of seeing her. She will find a reason for one of us to come over. I went thurs to take her more things she requested from the house. That was ok as I'd planned to do that anyway, plus there were bills I needed to help her pay. I figured I could do it then and have the weekend to catch up on cleaning, study for a microbiology test, sketch out my otter on canvas for oil painting.....and do all the easter stuff with the kids. Uh, no. She called me this morning (sat morning). God forbid we skipped friday. She called all upset that her ankles and feet were no longer grossly swollen. Said she'd called the nurse in and nurse said it was a good thing. Reluctantly nurse was calling doctor at mother in law insistance. Now mother in law's ankles and feet have been horribly swollen for about the last year. I explained that if the swelling was down that it was indeed a good thing, although it doesn't make sense and is odd. None of her medications have changed. mother in law seemed upset.......started going on about how she gives up.......A sympathy gaining routine. Maybe it was mean of me, but I ignored it. I had a million things to do today. I didn't have time to stop by the ALF to hold mother in law's hand or run a dozen errands for her. She's there so they will help her when she needs it, and all her needs are met. Wasn't like I was leaving her high and dry. And she has got to get over this expecting us to jump at her slightest whim thing. So.....I went and followed thru with Easter plans with the kids. I seem to be coming down with the stomach bug going around the art classes (oh goody) because I kept feeling worse and worse, then after eating.....all I wanted to do was toss my cookies. When we came home I headed up to bed. The nausea had gotten the better of me. When I came back down an hour or so later........husband said he'd gotten a phone call from his Mom. They had chilli for supper again. And she'd had him make a special trip to bring her a milkshake. OMG! So husband (since he feels guilty that she's there) wastes gas to go clear across town just to take his Mom a milkshake. Pardon me a minute while I stop to pound my head on the wall. This is what I'm talking about. And it's soooooooo out of character for mother in law. Used to be we had to force her to let us just do things for her. I know much of it is adjusting to the ALF. But honestly, I don't really see why it's affecting her so much. She has just as much independence as she did at home. The woman hadn't been able to leave her house in 2 yrs. She can still make all her own decisions and do as she pleases. Heck, she can do things in the ALF she hasn't been able to do for years! And she has all the help she needs as an added bonus. But she's acting like husband when he's pretending to be sick.......I guess attention seeking behavior.....and my patience is not going to last....not after dealing with it with husband all these years. It would be different if I was still a stay at home mom....but dang it to hades I don't have time for this carp!! She's running me and husband ragged. Awful. easy child plans to go visit with me and husband for Easter tomorrow. I'm a horrible daughter in law because after this week.....and the previous weeks......I just want to stay home and study/work on my painting. Makes me feel like an ogre but I can't help it. Thanks for letting me vent.