Well, how did this happen? I get a call on the phone that I have identified as "prison" on my directory and I don't know which son it is. D C 1 or D C 2. Oh brother where art thou? D C 1... Bipolar, was out on parole at halfway house for 10 weeks starting in February, got in a verbal altercation at the house, swore at the director, cussed out his parole officer and is now back in prison. He might have gone off his medications though he denies it. His hearing is tomorrow. If they revoke parole he will be in prison until 2017. All of the offenses, if he had a private attorney, would not have landed him in the system. But, unmedicated, he chose to be homeless and stay ill. He was estranged from us, and even if he wasn't we wouldn't help him to pursue a path that would keep him homeless and off required medication. Anyway, we'll find out Wednesday. There is no question that he will not be living at home now or ever in the future. Part of a vow my D H and I took to keep our home a sanctuary. And then.... My grandson's mother was arrested in May for theft/burglary. We found out she was smoking heroin as well. When she was arrested, her boyfriend was also arrested and is still incarcerated. Since she had been living with his FOO, this left her at loose ends. When she got out of jail, she went to stay with my son (D C 2) and my grandson. 2 has been working full time and has full custody of grand. He would only let babymama see grand in his presence. He had insisted that she could not stay with him, but he let her in and trouble ensued. We had started to see less of him, but attributed that to her being there and them doing things together. (Parenting, laundry, cooking, shopping, house cleaning HA!) 2 said that her being there let him sleep through the night because she would get up with grand. Grand is hyper and doesn't sleep well. Other than not seeing him every other day, as usual, I suspected nothing was wrong. Except I know in my gut that this kid is in constant contact unless he is up to no good. I just kept working my program/live and let live and enjoyed the peace. Saturday I called him as we were cooking out and he said he would be over with grand. I called and asked about their arrival and he told me that he and babymama decided to treat themselves and grand to a stay in a local motel with a pool. 2 was starting a 2 week summer break from work and they wanted to have some fun, family time. I said great have fun and hung up. Sunday at 9:15 pm I get a call from babymama from the motel still.WTF? She says she doesn't know where 2 is and that grand has been escaping from the room. I said what do you need? Do you want me to pick up grand? She said that would be a great help. Then there was a knock at her door and it was the police. I asked to speak to him and she handed him the phone. 2 had been arrested for DUI, fleeing the scene of an accident and then another car accident. This happened earlier in the day. I since found out he was going to buy more wine. The officer told me that grand had been running around nude and was found on a 4 lane highway nearby. They were taking babymama and grand to the police station. I told him D H and I would meet him there. We did and grand was cold, nude, scratched up, no diaper, exhausted. Officer told us that grand has gotten loose a total of seven times. The staff, patrons and police were looking for him at various times. They would find babymama passed out on the bed on several of those occasions. He said she was on something and that he was going to charge her with child endangerment. We took grand home. We aren't accepting calls from our son. Not going to bail him out or get his car out of impound. He is getting evicted from his apartment for the damage grand did to it. Grand is precocious and would turn on the water in the middle of the night. He flooded the apartment below twice. Babymama is released. So neither parent has a home, a car, 2 will probably lose his job and DCFS is taking them to court tomorrow to ask that we be made foster parents to grand. We have had grand 2 nights. We are still standing. But how long can we keep this up at the age of 58? D H took off last 2 days of work, but he goes back tomorrow. Most of this parenting will fall to me. It's not what I want. But, grand can't be handed off to strangers. No way. So we told DCFS that we are amenable to fostering for up to a year, but we need to feel out other family members or special needs foster homes for options. When grand is 15, we'll be 68. We can't do that and we know it. Our dear grand is going to need support his entire life. Is it kinder to have him placed somewhere when he's younger and with younger foster parents? He outruns us, so a summer day, if I'm home alone with him, has both of us inside with doors bolted. Same thing at night with D H. We can't go out in the yard, on the patio etc. He will go to the store and sit in a cart, but he'll be 5 in August and the time for that will soon pass. Babymama has an older sister with 2 boys. We are going to start to introduce her back into grand's life. There's hope there. I am so angry at both of them. And then I am grateful to her for calling us. If she didn't our grandson might not be alive today. So there's the pendulum, rage, shock, indignation, horror, thanks, love, detachment, acceptance, hope. I'm all over the place emotionally. Any experience with foster parents? Please share. And anything else you care to.