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Failure to Thrive
Brother is stealing and lying
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 686915" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>Echoing that if your parents want to enable grown brother, there is nothing you can do but talk to them. Its their decision. I have learned we cant change adults who dont want to change or who feel there are reasons they cant change. Your brother does sound like an addict. But only he can change that too.</p><p></p><p>Talking to people who deny problems or wont change gets old too and in their chaos you can end up the designated bad guy. I would stay out of it. Notice that all the rescuing and help and psychology appointments that your parents did is not changing your brother. They cant change him. He is what he is. And you can't change any of them either. Not one bit. Not by over talking, arguing or scolding.it has to come from their heads, not yours. People often disregard even the best advice.</p><p></p><p>You can only change yourself and your reaction to the drama. Learning to detach has helped me in every area of life. If I know I can't control somerhing, I accept it rather thsn going around in circles trying to change what I can't.</p><p></p><p></p><p>I hope you can learn to let go of things you cant change and just try to live your best life possible. Good.luck. (your enabling parents are actually not that rare,)</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 686915, member: 1550"] Echoing that if your parents want to enable grown brother, there is nothing you can do but talk to them. Its their decision. I have learned we cant change adults who dont want to change or who feel there are reasons they cant change. Your brother does sound like an addict. But only he can change that too. Talking to people who deny problems or wont change gets old too and in their chaos you can end up the designated bad guy. I would stay out of it. Notice that all the rescuing and help and psychology appointments that your parents did is not changing your brother. They cant change him. He is what he is. And you can't change any of them either. Not one bit. Not by over talking, arguing or scolding.it has to come from their heads, not yours. People often disregard even the best advice. You can only change yourself and your reaction to the drama. Learning to detach has helped me in every area of life. If I know I can't control somerhing, I accept it rather thsn going around in circles trying to change what I can't. I hope you can learn to let go of things you cant change and just try to live your best life possible. Good.luck. (your enabling parents are actually not that rare,) [/QUOTE]
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Failure to Thrive
Brother is stealing and lying
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