But I'm 18...

[mstang67chic]

OMG, do they EVER stop saying that??? difficult child has been 18 for all of 6 days. SIX DAYS! And that's all I've heard since. If I say ANYTHING to him about what he's doing or planning on doing, that's what I hear. If he tells me about something he's thinking about doing, I hear it before I even get a chance to take a breath. I don't know why I never heard about this when I turned 18 but apparently when you're 18 and even though you still live at home, you can do any stupid thing you want.

He asked me tonight if he could do the Kool-aid thing on his hair. (snort.......like THAT'S going to happen again). I told him that the original deal was that he had to finish this semester with a C or better in ALL classes. I got a look like I was stupid and totally wacked out of my mind and then he said (all together now) "But I'm 18".

 

[witzend]

18 is old enough to get an eviction notice, isn't it? I'd get a landlord/tenant contract together and let him know if he's old enough to decide these things for himself he's old enough for the adult consequences.

Is he a Senior? I hope he's ready to find an apartment in June!

 

[KTMom91]

Miss KT will be 17 in August, and I'm already tired of hearing about when she's 18.

 

[meowbunny]

Yeah, I heard that a lot. I finally looked at her and gave her a choice -- follow the house rules or become an adult. If you pay half of the household expenses, then you can do what you please or you can move out and pay your own way.

Good luck with your son. At least it's a typical kid thing. They really do believe that because they're now old enough to sign a contract and vote they really are adults. I'd just remind that being 18 means he can now have adult responsibilities to go with those adult rights, give him a breakdown of what his share of household expenses would be and the costs of his own apartment and then let him make the choice of what he wants to do -- stay home and follow the rules or be an adult.

 

[WhymeMom?]

The phrase "I'm MOM." tops I'm 18......I would reply with this until he gets the idea that everytime he brings up 18 you bring up mom....he will get tired of hearing it just as you do the 18 thing......

 

[Big Bad Kitty]

I use the phrase "MY HOUSE, MY RULES." Otherwise they can take their 18 year old koolaid-hair wearing self right out the door.

 

[Star*]

Here are some suggestions -

difficult child - But I'm 18 - or I'm almost 18

You: Each time you hear this send yourself a mental rose - make a red mark on the calendar next to the day you hear this - at the end of the month see how many roses you have given yourself.

You: (retort) "Yeah but you're no where near 21." that should leave them guessing

You: (spiritual) "Well thank GOD - now I can legally evict you for being a poop."

You: (patriotic) "I called a marine recruiter for you since you're 18."

You: (sock puppet) - No really - just do your hand like a sock puppet. Bla Bla Bla

You: (with surprise) "OH MY GOSH when did THAT happen?"

You: (with gusto) "Sooooooooooooooooooo you still behave like a 10 yr. old."

You: (Opera) "No you cannot be 18, For I was there the day you were Booooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooorrrrrrrrrrrrrrrn and I am 29 today - you are a Liaaaaaaaaaaar."

You: (crazy) "Yes, you're 18, hey look a squirrel on my head (dances in circle)

You: (teacher) "What is the square root of 18?"

You: (scientist) "Eighteen ? Do you know every time you smarted off you cut your life expectancy by 3 days? You may not live to see 18 and 1/2 - so sad."

You: (sarcastic) "Yeah you're 18 - Whooooopie - Good 4 YOU." (exhale like a teen)

You: (talk show host) "So how long have you known you were 18?" Next - 18 year olds who think they OWN the world just for turning a day older, and fighting rednecks in jello.

You: (police) You have the right to remain silent - Oh skip it you'll never shut up.

You: (the zen master) "You are now one with your own self-centered being and harmonious light shines from all orifices to indicate that you are 18." breath deep, now dog on a taco position.....exhale, and roll into a fetal position.

You (the Mayce's Parade MC) "Okay people we have a lot lot lot to do - He/She is 18 today so we've blocked off everything from 101'st to Broadway and QUE the flying reindeer, 12 color no...strike that 18 color ticker tape parade....and will SOMEONE GET ME A Double expresso, light steam, 1/2 caf, Moccha, with sprinkles and whole cream? I have to throw an I'm 18 with 700,000 other people today party....

You (the croc. hunter) "G'day mate - 18 already? Bugga -

 

[hearts and roses]

Eighteen Schmeighteen! Fortunately, easy child never pulled that on us. And difficult child pulled it but her words fell on deaf ears. Like BBK said, "MY house, MY rules" and difficult child had already graduated HS before she was 18, so that changed things as well.

Hang in there, create a contract and let him know you know business.

 

[susiestar]

I go with the contract. Make sure you know what you have to do to evict him - many areas will require LEGAL eviction proceedings. BUT you can still search his room, sing Barney songs to him, all sorts of things. Have some fun with it.

I like Star's responses. Soemtimes they will save your sanity.

Just make sure you have a contract so you CAN kick him out. Our kids are often savvy to the laws that they like, like not being able to just be thrown out.

With my kids, when they argue, I sing, "Cause I'm the MOM, yeah yeah yeah". It is to the tune of the Blonde song in Earth Girls are Easy.

I also will sing the line, "I've got the power" from some song. My kids obey then. They hate my singing!

Susie

 

[mstang67chic]

Contract, or as it's known around here: The House Rules For Anyone 18 and older living at *insert our address here* And Whose Name Does NOT Appear On The Deed - got it. He signed it ON his birthday.

My house, my rules - comes out automatically now

Star............I'm printing those out and giving a copy to my step-mom. My brother is 17 and my youngest sister is almost 14 going on 22. I'm sure she could use that list. Plus I can't wait to see the look on his face when he mouths off and I tell him to hold that thought while I whip out my response list!

I think we're going to have to set him straight on these I'm 18 and can do it all thoughts. He was all snarky on his birthday because that parade Star described just didn't happen.

Course, he was kind of like that when the adoption happened. His mind seems to be wired to think that everytime there's a major milestone, it's just going to magically fix everything. It never does of course but he keeps hoping.....kind of like Linus and the Great Pumpkin. umpkin:

 

[Star*]

You know - I created that list just for you!!!! Share with whomever -

Personally I'm saving the squirrel on my head and dances in a circle each time I am told.

-mostly because I can't sing opera.

 

[mstang67chic]

I can't sing either so doubt I'll be using that one. The squirrel one however........I marked that one special on my step-mom's copy. My youngest sister found a dead squirrel in the toilet last year.

 

[Hound dog]

Star that list is awesome.

I don't care about hair dyeing unless it's NOT done IN my house and with anything other than what is considered a "normal" color. Doesn't mean that I don't have to remind every now and again. Nichole just put some rather cute blonde streaks into the front of her hair. I'm surprised I actually like it. lol BUT she did it over at easy child's house because neither of my girls could do it without making a royal mess and ruining my towels.

I haven't gotten "I'm 18 out of Travis yet." I wonder if her forgot? lol

I got "I"m 18 out of Nichole once. She wanted to sleep over at boyfriend's house" I got the 18 thing with the NO I gave her.

So I told her since obviously living arrangments were not a problem for her that she needed to come home and pack hers and the baby's belongings. Because if she had somewhere else to sleep why on earth was my GROWN daughter still livng with me with HER daughter?

Yeah. End of the discussion. lol

easy child I don't recall ever trying it. But by then she'd earned enough freedom that it wasn't necessary I guess.

I've been lucky on that score.

 

[Star*]

Mustang -

That squirrel wanted to......

Potty all the time potty all the time potty all the time.........lol

 

[mstang67chic]

I wrote that down to tell my step mom when she gets the list.



(I had a lot more rofl's in here but the system would only allow me 8)

 

[Star*]

Having a friend with unique wiring can have it's advantages.

 

[susiestar]

Star,

For some reason Jess just CAN'T wait until I am out of the bathroom to ask me something or talk to me about whatever flits around in her head.

I sang the "potty all the time" at her last time - she ran, covering her eyes. I guess I will be able to potty in peace for a while. I hope.

For those discounting Opera response because they can't sing: This is the PERFECT response for you. The horrible singing makes the response that much more perfect. Because the kids HATE it!!!

At one point my husband told difficult child that if he gave any more grief at school husband was going to the school. To dedicate and sing Barney songs over the PA system. (The school LOVED it, begged him to do it at one point. difficult child cleaned up his act just in time to avoid it!).

IF they do the "I'm 18" in front of friends, then you ask if they will buy their own Tinkerbell underwear now? - in front of friends!

Susie

 

[Hound dog]

Susie


You and husband are evil........


Just like ME!!

 

[Sue C]

mstang -- Melissa used to say it all the time when she turned 18. I think I answered something like it was time for her to act like 18 and not a 2-yr-old. She is 22 now and still living at home. When she turned 21, all I heard from her was "I'm 21 now." My answer was, "Then why don't you act like you're 21 instead of a teenager?" I think she stopped saying it after a few months. It never got her anywhere with me.

Star -- You are so funny. Those are GREAT responses!!! I could have used some of those responses back when Melissa was 18, but I don't think I could have remembered all of them and it would be hard to choose which one to use 'cuz they are all so GREAT!

sue

 

[mstang67chic]

At one point my husband told difficult child that if he gave any more grief at school husband was going to the school. To dedicate and sing Barney songs over the PA system. (The school LOVED it, begged him to do it at one point. difficult child cleaned up his act just in time to avoid it!).

IF they do the "I'm 18" in front of friends, then you ask if they will buy their own Tinkerbell underwear now? - in front of friends!

Susie

At one point when difficult child was in elementary school, back when his behaviour caused two teachers to take a sabbatical, I threatened him. I told him that if he couldn't control himself in class, I would come with him. In a robe, fuzzy slippers, rollers in my hair and scratching my bum. I told this to the teacher too and she loved it also! It didn't cure him completely but it helped for a bit. He knew I would do it and knew that it wouldn't embarrass me one bit.

And the Tinkerbell underwear comment? OMG!!!!