Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by guest3, Oct 17, 2007.
sigh........on the bright side I save $
sorry that you are going throught his but you are not alone i know it hard to belive but look at this site . people all over from state to state is going through and frustration i have pass that i am to the point that i just lift me hands to god and ask him for help and power to handle this i will be praying for you stay strong
I'm sorry that this has happened. It is so difficult for us to have a life that even somewhat resembles that of the people around us. I get it that everyone has their private lives and we don't know what happens in them, and that other people's kids get into trouble and we don't know about it. But we are in such a different situation. Not being able to have careers or make plans because we don't know whether our children will be in school or after care from one day to the next. It's a lonely place to be in, and certainly not what we thought would happen when those sweet little babies came home with us.
I really feel like our society has failed us and our children.
I have been battling the school system for over 7 years. The school system here is failing to meet the needs of children with mental health needs on a daily basis. I have placed my son in private school and still the battle continues. It drives me nuts when I read that children are entitled to "a free and appropriate education." Schools are not able to define appropriate. They claim to have an individualized plan... Individualized meaning a cardboard one size fits all mold... Heaven forbid that one throws in the word bipolar or odd!
Sorry...just needed to vent...
I am so sorry. Have you checked in over on the Special Education forum? They may be able to give you some cocrete ideas.
Hugs, I do know how lonely it is, and how scary and frustrating.
I'm so sorry. It is so frustrating when things like this happen. Hugs.
I got a similar spiel to this, with difficult child 3. Child care in our village was hard to get, I had scored a place due to my disability and part-time volunteer work.
But difficult child 3 WAS a handful, he was doing OK but this child care was in-home, council-supervised. A person-who-shall-remain-nameless (very pushy, her husband had me on his hate list due to HIS behaviour) approached difficult child 3's carer with an Offer She Couldn't Refuse. She'd also approached the council separately, to get difficult child 3 thrown out so her baby could be taken instead. The argument I was given - this other mother needed to get back into PAID employment (ie work from home for her husband) and what I was doing as a volunteer charity worker and part-time publishing assistant was far less important (and by implication, equally unimportant was my desperate need for respite). I proposed a compromise - we each use the placement part-time. But no compromise was acceptable - I had to go. Or rather, difficult child 3 did. The fact that I was also in some part-time paid work and trying to increase the hours, meant nothing - I was up against Pushy Wife of local ratbag, who got council on side to insist I give up the placement.
What really got to me was the whole attitude of, "My work is more important than your work, so you have to step aside and give me the place." I mean, they could afford a nanny! A house full of nannies!
She and her husband had been throwing their weight around and hurting a number of local people, it wasn't just me. But I was a good friend of someone thoroughly in their sights, hence they were happy to attack me rather than someone whose loyalty they might value.
I stayed on good terms with the live-in carer, she's a good person. But her hands were tied.
Often in things like this, you have to look at the politics. Then you have to look at your entitlements and see what you can do.
We found an alternative - not as good, but it worked out alright in the long run.
I wish I had advice, or something.
Know this. Whatever is going on now, it will not always be this way.
On top of this the rec department will not allow me to sign him up for basketball, sigh....................
Have you checked with your county mental health to see if they have any services, providers, etc that might help with this situation.
This is one of the many reasons we sought services; no child care for either tweedle. After being kicked out of a special needs after school care program we were toast. That on top of false accusations of abuse brought county mental health to my home; with CMH services. With those services in home personal care attendants.
Check into it - you may have access to some service, special needs provider - something. Many times you cannot count on the school district. In fact, I think they should be the last people to count on except for immediate educational needs.
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