Can I legally kick a 19 yr old child out of the house even if he is still in school

Discussion in 'Parent Emeritus' started by plshelpme, Mar 2, 2012.

  1. plshelpme

    plshelpme New Member

    I live in Wisconsin with my husband and his almost 19 yr old son (that is now a super senior in high school). This child when he moved in with us he had told his brother that "he don't care what we say he is 18 and he is going to do what he want's".
    He is constantly lies, has been late or unexcused from his classes 10 time in the last 30 days. We have caught him stealing from us and when we call him out on lie and steeling there is no remorse!!!!!!!!! We have told him that we were moving in June of this year and he would need to find a job so he can move out on his own. We told him this a year ago and to date has not filled out 1 application. We have to lock up food that we want saved, we have changed the lock on the garage door and have bought a save to keep personal things in.
    Can we leagally kick him out of the house even with him enrolled in school?
  2. DaisyFace

    DaisyFace Love me...Love me not

    Hello and welcome--

    It depends on your state. For Wisconsin, it is when the child turns 19 or graduates high school - whichever comes first.
  3. Tiredof33

    Tiredof33 Active Member

    In Florida I wanted to lock my difficult child out when he was out of control and I was told I was legally responsible for anything he did until he is 18 or still in high school. Some states I think are 21 if in school. I spoke with the detention center, but you may be able to find out online, mine was a long time ago.

    HOWEVER: if he is stealing from you he can be arrested if you report him. Even then for a first arrest most judges go easy on them because they are kids. Is he going to graduate??

    It is so stressful to have to lock everything up and mine and his friends stole from me so much. It's like it's a game to them to see just how much they can torture us!
  4. Star*

    Star* call 911

    Welcome to the Board!

    Daisy is right about WI laws.......

    I would add however - THEFT, in ANY STATE is a prosecutable offense and if he steals from you? You can call the police, file a report, and have him arrested. Chances are if he's doing it at home? He's doing it elsewhere and it's a matter of time before he's caught anyway. (or so I'm told by the police) If he's arrested for theft then he'll at least have a paper trail started and depending on the amount of the items he stolen he may get jail time - which is possibly enough time for him to either graduate or turn 19 - and They DO have GED classes available through any unemployment office nation-wide.

    Would be worth calling or visiting your local police office and asking a few questions - write them down. OR calling Legal aid and asking an attorney because the police while doing their job - DO NOT know the legal system like attorneys.
  5. buddy

    buddy New Member

    If you find you need to give him notice in writing then do it now.... sounds like you need him out yesterday.
  6. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    When does he turn 19? I would start those eviction papers now. Give him plenty of time to get ready. Johnny boy has 90 days to secure permanent housing away from your home as soon as school is over even if he does choose to fail school again. I cannot believe any state wants to make parents keep idiot kids in parents homes just to hold them over a barrel. I would lay down strict rules and any violation means a call to the cops. No drugs, no drinking, no taking your car, no one over your house without express permission, no stealing your stuff, no damage, no verbal threats, etc. You do know verbal threats are assault and can be considered terroristic threats.
  7. mrsammler

    mrsammler Guest

    He's 19. Serve him eviction papers tomorrow. Give him whatever is required of landlords by the state--probably 30 days. If you want him out NOW (and you should), go to a magistrate and explain your situation and ask what you can do to have him removed ASAP. He/she will advise you that you can swear out warrants for whatever crimes he has already committed against you or your property recently--theft, destruction of property, uttering threats, assault (which can be simply the clear/spoken threat of violence, with or without physical contact)--and then have him arrested, which gets him out of your house while the eviction clock is ticking. If all goes well regarding the timing of court dates (and often the police or court can help you regarding this, if they know your situation--i.e., that you need him out for 30 days), he can cool his heels in jail for the entire 30 days and then you can complete the eviction--i.e., remove his belongings and lock him out--and then drop the charges. I.e., use the charges and jail time to "eat" the 30 days in which he would otherwise make you miserable, steal from you, destroy property, etc.

    It's a sternly pragmatic way to get him out. It might seem heartless to those who aren't living with his mistreatment of you . But it gets the job done.
  8. witzend

    witzend Well-Known Member

    His 19th birthday present should be locked doors and possessions on the porch.
  9. plshelpme

    plshelpme New Member

    Thank you everyone for your advice. I never went through this **** with my children-they are very respectful and never lied or stole from me. I feel like I am a prison guard in my own home with locks on as much as possible to protect at least some of my things. My husband and I are going to buy a surveilance camera and set it up and see what is going on when he is off of school and we are working. I'm starting to hate going home to listen to more BS lies and excuses. (3 More months and he is out of there)
  10. JJJ

    JJJ Active Member

    Be sure to follow the legal eviction procedures in your state. You can get him out but there are legal steps. If you have sold the house, be sure to do this or he may not leave when you do and it will cause problems with your buyers.
  11. JJJ

    JJJ Active Member

    Tempting, very tempting...but I don't think that is legal in any state.