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Parent Emeritus
Can't give an inch...
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 642087" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>GM...you need to accept things for yourself, hon. I know YOU don't have much. Why on earth would you give that gift to your daughter? She may blow it on drugs.</p><p></p><p>Today I went shopping with Jumper, my easy child. I let her pick out some of her Christmas presents. After all, she is 18 and knows Santa is me...lol. She is very gracious and when she picks something out it is with hesitation and after she checks the prcies even when I tell her not to and she is truly grateful when she gets something. And I know for a fact nothing goes to drugs or booze...she does neither. Now if I had told 37 "let's go shopping for Christmas" it would have been totally different and with a whole different attitude like "I deserve it and I don't' appreciate it." The weird thing is, you can give and give to a easy child and they don't get a bad attitude or ever expect it in a mean way. You can't do that with a difficult child. I still believe msot of our difficult children have personality disorders and that is why they act so different from the average person.</p><p></p><p>GM, your daughter should want you to keep your own gifts. My kids would have protested, except for 37.</p><p></p><p>I think sometimes we believe our kids will appreciate us more if we just give them enough. It's weird. With difficult children just the opposite happens. the more we try, the more we give into them out of love, and the more we give to them, even at our own sacrifice, the less they respect us. It's like living on Backwards Planet, ya know? <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite2" alt=";)" title="Wink ;)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=";)" /></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 642087, member: 1550"] GM...you need to accept things for yourself, hon. I know YOU don't have much. Why on earth would you give that gift to your daughter? She may blow it on drugs. Today I went shopping with Jumper, my easy child. I let her pick out some of her Christmas presents. After all, she is 18 and knows Santa is me...lol. She is very gracious and when she picks something out it is with hesitation and after she checks the prcies even when I tell her not to and she is truly grateful when she gets something. And I know for a fact nothing goes to drugs or booze...she does neither. Now if I had told 37 "let's go shopping for Christmas" it would have been totally different and with a whole different attitude like "I deserve it and I don't' appreciate it." The weird thing is, you can give and give to a easy child and they don't get a bad attitude or ever expect it in a mean way. You can't do that with a difficult child. I still believe msot of our difficult children have personality disorders and that is why they act so different from the average person. GM, your daughter should want you to keep your own gifts. My kids would have protested, except for 37. I think sometimes we believe our kids will appreciate us more if we just give them enough. It's weird. With difficult children just the opposite happens. the more we try, the more we give into them out of love, and the more we give to them, even at our own sacrifice, the less they respect us. It's like living on Backwards Planet, ya know? ;) [/QUOTE]
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