Carpool From Hell

[gcvmom]

easy child is going to our district's GATE magnet middle school this year -- it's about 8 miles away in the next town. An old friend from the elementary school she went to two years ago is also going to this school and the mom asked me about carpooling this year. It's the same school difficult child 2 went to last year and we did carpool with another family, which worked out great. The dad picked up the kids in the afternoon and I took the morning route. So I figured we could work out a similar arrangement with this family, plus easy child gets along pretty well with the daughter and they live fairly close to us.

Well apparently things don't look so simple for this other mom, and she's been talking to another mom who now has TEN families on this carpool list and she added us to it. To make matters more sticky, I see three names on the list who I KNOW easy child does not like to be around and quite frankly, I don't want to deal with these kids either (can you say spoiled brats from families that have too much money and not enough time for their kids so they just throw more money at the problem).

I think I'm going to show easy child the list and see if there's anyone else she knows and would be willing to carpool with, and if not, we'll quietly bow out of this mess. Although there are quite a few kids from her class last year that are going to this new school, I don't think any of them live near us. This just does not seem worth the aggravation to me.

 

[svengandhi]

If there are that many kids and your SD doesn't provide transportation, why don't you look into hiring a bus company to take all of the kids? The cost spread out might not be that bad and you have to factor in your time and gas money and wear and tear on your car. It also would seem that with that many kids on the list, unless the ones you don't like live closest to you, there's only a small chance you would be paired with them. I would assume that a permanent set of groups would be set up and once that's done, you wouldn't have contact with the other kids. Why not speak to the people you would want to drive with and see if you can form your own group and then present that to the listmaker?

 

[KTMom91]

Having ten families involved in one carpool seems to me to be asking for a colossal mess to happen on a regular basis. And you know who'll be picking up the slack when someone forgot? The stay-at-home mom, 'cause you don't do anything all day anyway...right?

 

[DDD]

Well....at least you don't have that annoying squealing pig from the commercials! lol DDD

 

[KTMom91]

Maxwell! You're home!

 

[keista]

What is this other woman thinking? I like the hiring a bus idea, but that doesn't help with the spoiled brat issue.

If it were me, I'd be bowing out already. Even if someone else is doing all that organizing, it's too overwhelming for me. One or two other fams is enough.

 

[gcvmom]

sven... I'm not sure how the organizer plans to put this together. Right now she's creating a chart based on everyone's requirements (yes, many of these moms work either full-time or part-time -- I am probably the rare exception as a stay at home mom), so carpooling is really a necessity for a lot of them.

I didn't recognize most of the names on this list -- probably because easy child has been away from her home elementary school for two years so she may not know most of these kids. We'll see.

As for why the district doesn't provide a bus, it's because none of us lives in the home territory for this magnet school and we are all electing to send our kids there. Besides, any district transport comes with a fee, even if you live in the bus zone for your neighborhood school. Gone are the days of the free bus ride to school.

Mary, colossal mess just about sums up my thoughts!

The aspie boy we carpooled with last year became our Maxwell by the end of the year. difficult child 2 could not stand talking to him as the year wore on, but then he's a difficult child in his own right and sometimes two people that share similar annoying traits can wear on eachother, Know what I mean??

I may be able to just have husband take her since it's on his way to work and he's usually leaving late anyway.

 

[tiredmommy]

All's fair in love & carpools. Did you see any names on the list that would work well for easy child? If so, circumvent this woman and see if the other family wants a kinder, gentler carpool.

 

[gcvmom]

Looks like easy child only knows the three or four I know, of which only one she was open to carpooling with... So we'll see. Since that mom wants the morning run, maybe I just deal with picking up easy child myself.

 

[TerryJ2]

Nonononono, you are not a bus driver. Too many people!
I agree, bow out.

 

[Hound dog]

Bow out and forget the car pooling. It's not worth the aggravation, the hassle, the headaches, and especially the DRAMA.

 

[gcvmom]

Yes, the more I think about this, the more I agree with that approach!

 

[Mattsmom277]

I think it sounds like it could be disaster. I'd either bow out and make your own arrangements, or how about the one family you did this with last year? Perhaps they would like to keep it simple and swap with just you again this year? Surely there's one family that would like to share driving but not on some big scale with that many kids etc. You can always say that your prefer just sharing with one family so if that works for someone, you'd be open to that.

How are 10 kids being carpooled anyhow? Multiple cars must be needed for there in the morning and back after school. Don't know many families with room for 10 in their cars. Not to mention holy a lot of time spent picking up and dropping off. Sounds a hassle rather than a helpful approach.

I always feel better keeping things like that simple.

 

[gcvmom]

Mattsmom, the boy we carpooled with last year has moved on to high school, so that family is not an option. I'm sure there will be a couple of groups formed out of this cluster, because as you point out, there's no way ALL of them could be accommodated in one carpool.

I'm just going to hold off and see where the chips fall after the first week of school. We may find someone else who'd be more suitable.