Cat Get Warning From Police for Being in Tree

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by susiestar, May 4, 2017.

  1. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    Newport Police 'issue warning' to cat that looks like it's holding an assault rifle

    Police actually issued a warning to a CAT for being up in a tree clinging to a branch that looked like an assault rifle.

    What is a cat supposed to care what the police think? How is the cat supposed to know if the branch looks like a rifle or not? Is the cat supposed to check before it settles down for a nap on the branch?

    I have cats. I have had cats for most of my life. I cannot think of a single one of my cats who would have given a darn if the cops cared what their branches looked like. Well, O'Malley would have thought it was hilarious and would have done it again and again for attention, probably. He was a little brat. The rest? Would not have cared one bit what the cops wanted. If they liked the branch, they would have kept using it, if they didn't, they would have found a better one.

    Seriously, what are people thinking? CATS with assault rifles??? REALLY?????????

    Some of this is just too absurd for words.
     
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  2. AppleCori

    AppleCori Well-Known Member

    I guess the cat wouldn't sign a written warning?

    It sounds like the warning was a light-hearted joke, but it really does look like an assault rifle!

    Great picture!
     
  3. RN0441

    RN0441 100% better than I was but not at 100% yet

    That is friggin hysterical. Thanks for the laugh!
     
  4. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    My cat would probably hiss at the cop and get another warning for being disrespectful.
     
  5. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    Captain Morgan is absolutely FASCINATED by anyone wearing a toolbelt. I am terrified to think of what he would do if he had an opposable thumb and access to a gun. He really really REALLY wants to use tools. Let ANYONE near him use a tool and he watches in total rapture, he just won't take his eyes off whatever they are doing. So if he saw someone using a gun? And then saw a holster so he could wear one? He would be so in love with the idea!!! Then he would probably mug a cop to get one of his own if a cop tried to write him a ticket.
     
  6. GoingNorth

    GoingNorth Crazy Cat Lady

    My absolute favorite was during the hell that was dealing with the ins a adjuster after a plumbing failure flooded and did massive damage to my trailer up North.

    The adjuster was a class-A schmuck, accused me several times of attempting to defraud the ins company, etc.

    One day, he was out and we were arguing. It got loud, and Thomas, who usually hides when strangers are in the house, ambled passed us, bristling, and made his way into the living room where the adjuster had left his toolbox, containing various expensive electronic/computerized equipment, open on the coffee table.

    As I watched over the adjuster's shoulder, Thomas arranged himself carefully over the open toolbox, squatted, and proceeded to deposit a bladderful of urine in it, and all over those expensive electronics.

    He then stood up, and skulked back to the bedroom and back under the bed.

    When the adjuster came out 3 days later, he was driving a different vehicle. I asked him where his company van was, and he said, "YOUR goddamned cat peed all over my toolbox and equipment! We still can't figure out how to get the stink out of the van, AND...I have to pay to replace everything!!"

    I smiled sweetly and said, "Oh. I really doubt that. Both cats are terrified of strangers. Did you SEE either of the cats actually pee on your stuff?"

    Of course, he mutters and sputters... I managed to hold in the giggles until I signed the paperwork refusing to accept their settlement offer and he left.

    Meanwhile, all I'm' thinking is, "Thomas only eats a specific type of cat food and two types of cat treat. How on earth do I reward him?!"
     
  7. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    I ADORE Thomas!!!!!!!

    Reminds me of Ralph Kitty! Ralph was so named because he had a nervous tummy. He would vomit, or Ralph, when people fought or got tense or upset. He really hated PMS. I had him when I lived with a roommate in college. She got a boyfriend who had some problems. They fought constantly. Needless to say, Ralph Kitty was not fond of the boyfriend. He took revenge often. One lovely morning I woke up to the boyfriend screaming because he had to go fo his Marine Reserves duty and he had a huge fit the night before. So Ralph Kitty deposited two loads of vomit in his boots. One load included a partially digested mouse.

    Ralph Kitty only barfed in shoes if the fights got physical. Usually it was just any clothes left on the floor. We learned to pick our clothes up, lol!
     
  8. GoingNorth

    GoingNorth Crazy Cat Lady

    Our Wolf cat, who was so attached to Stu that he used to spray his combat gear if he sensed Stu was getting ready to deploy, used to leave half eaten rodents and various bugs in husband's combat boots.

    Not out of maliciousness, but to make sure he had snacks while traveling.

    husband had a rather hair-raising story about Wolf's escapades. He was riding in Blackhawk helicoptor over the jungle in South America when the Crew Chief suddenly announced, "Find out what the hell smells like cat piss and toss it the hell out of here!" I gather at jungle temps, husband's gear had gotten rather ripe. Luckily he managed to lay low and get where he was going without having to parachute out and make his way overland to his teams' destination.