CD Annual Tears, Jeers, & Grumbles Mother's Day Thread

[SRL]

If you're one of those moms that isn't looking forward to Mother's Day coming up on Sunday, this thread is for you. Maybe your expectations of Mother's Day are far, far away from the reality that's coming your way Sunday. Or maybe holidays aren't your thing but you have family obligations to meet. Maybe parenting isn't very fun or is downright painful or maybe you're in the grips of depression and can't face another day. Whatever the reason, this thread's for you.

I'm not real big on holidays but I swear I really should have investigated the traditions of the family I married into first. On My Special Day...drum roll please...they have a family get together meaning one mom cleans house, and all the rest cook, bake, pack up kids, travel, eat, open gifts, clean up, pack up, and drive home again. In the kitchen you'll find the women complaining about doing the work while the men visit in the other room, so you'd think they'd jump all over sister in law's and my suggestion that we GO OUT, CARRY IN, or USE A CATERER. No go, they like it that way (martyrdom and motherhood go hand in hand, you know). So it would be accurate to say I'm usually quite a bear to live with on My Special Day.

This year we're a smaller group so sister in law and I suggested a new approach, to no success. In the whole scheme of things this holiday isn't worth a family battle so I'll let it go, but two years ago I did promise myself I was done cooking. I told sister in law to let them know we'd take care of fruit and veggies...and then I'm stopping at the store to pick up for both of us on our way out of town. It will raise eyebrows but I don't care.

What about you--what's making Mother's Day the day you'd rather mark off the calendar? What will you be doing on Your Special Day?

If you're one of *those* types who thinks a $5 Hallmark and one day off a year to put you on a pedestal is the next best thing to sliced, toast, you just skedaddle out of here onto your own happy thread. We're busy commisterating here.

 

[timer lady]

Mother's Day & Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) do not mix! In fact, I could skip this holiday every year as it's barely recognized by my children.

I told husband & kt that I didn't want breakfast in bed as I always ended up cleaning up the mess in the kitchen anyway. I didn't want candy; can we say prednisone & 100 lb weight gain? Neither husband, kt or wm have figured out that I like gold earrings not silver. I don't look good wearing silver. AND it's not about the gifts anyway. It's about honor & respect.

A day off. That's what I have this year as kt is off to respite until 3 pm on Sunday. I can do this. No visit to wm!

I loved honoring my mother - our yearly tradition as adults was a wonderful brunch gathering at a local country club & a round of golf.

As the mother to tweedles I no longer have expectations for holidays other than doing all the work with little appreciation.

 

[crazymama30]

I thought it was great as easy child was throwing a fit because I have to work on mother's day. Hellooo, she was more upset than I, it was pretty crazy

 

[Abbey]

My perfect Mother's Day would be a nice note from my kids and to be alone. Silent. No birds, no kids and friends, no husband, no cleaning...just alone. It wouldn't cost a dime. That's a sad thing to say.

Abbey

 

[slsh]

Well, I remembered in time (kinda) to get flowers to my mom, 'cuz heaven knows I'm already the worst daughter in the world in her book. She has a great florist who takes pity on me for being tardy, always.

Actually, I didn't remember - didn't even realize the "big day" was this weekend until I got my annual Mother's Day bouquet from my brother. Don't ask me why he sends me one every year... I haven't a clue, but it's a good reminder.

Diva and Wee arrived home this afternoon with progress reports that just about did me in - 2 D's for her, 1 F (and straight A's otherwise????) for him. I swear, they must have coordinated their stories on the walk home. They both have forcefully inhaling grades becuase they "forgot" to turn work in. I call fertilizer on that.

Have I mentioned we're doing *major* renovations here - well, we're not, but the contractors are. Today was the day they ripped out one of the outside walls - my brain is still rattling from all the noise. Upon being presented with these lovely progress reports, I banished them both from my sight, had a glass of wine with my 3rd Motrin of the day, and told husband to handle it.

thank you arrived home this evening... without medications. He only has to remember to bring *one* thing home - his medications. Where are they? Who knows. Somewhere at the agency, "I bet case worker knows". Zennnnnnnnn..... so much for lifeskills training. The whole point of him taking the train home is so that we *don't* have to deal with Chicago traffic on a Friday night. For the record, I am the most unreasonable woman in the world for being royally ticked that one of us had to schlep back up in the city (yes, I delegated to husband again - God, I love that man!!!). When I announced that thank you had to go too, he decided he'd just stay there. Imagine, having to sit in a car for what has so far turned out to be a 3-hour trip (they're not home yet) because *he* forgot his medications. Oh, my, gosh. I should've just put his little posterior back on the doggone train to retrieve them.

So - it's cold, the heater is still kicking on, we're missing an outside wall because of Boo's new accessible bathroom (that is not insulated yet), Wee and Diva are in deep jello with Diva already having been grounded for her little snit earlier this week, thank you has an attitude because we should just shuffle behind him to remedy his major goofs (and be doggone happy to do it), and I'm guaranteed a call to my mother where she will do her very best to induce massive quantities of guilt because I didn't schlep down to St. Louis on Mother's Day to spend it with her. Sheesh... she doesn't know how lucky she is to have peace and quiet!!

There will be no cooking this weekend. I think there are a lot of movies on DVD that need to be seen!

Hope you guys have a good one - this weekend too shall pass.

 

[Abbey]

Actually, I didn't remember - didn't even realize the "big day" was this weekend until I got my annual Mother's Day bouquet from my brother. Don't ask me why he sends me one every year... I haven't a clue, but it's a good reminder.

What a good brother. Enjoy.

Abbey

 

[house of cards]

My joyful holiday stared early when my little difficult child M, 3 yo kicked me at the Mother's Day tea I attended. He isn't adjusting well to preschool and is mad at me for making him go but come on He Kicked Me!

 

[SRL]

House of Cards, I thought of you when I was out shopping for Mother's Day cards and tried to pick out the perfect card. I never did see anything appropriate for mothers who have been kicked at the Mother's Day tea. "Relax and enjoy your special day" doesn't cut it nor does "My Mother, My Friend". I suppose "Thinking of you" would work as it didn't specify WHAT the giver was thinking at the time.

So, who writes these cards anyway? Everyone in the aisle with me spent at least ten minutes trying to find something. I have to tell you some of them were really stupid. Some annoying beeping was coming from a card a man kept opening and closing so I asked about it. Good thing too, because he was hearing impaired and couldn't discern the sound but after he read my lips going "beep, beep, beep" he wisely put it back on the rack.

Did anyone else notice all the cards with past tense messages? "Mom, you always loved me..." For pete's sake, are these for mothers whose days are numbered?

And then there was the top rack. Those are the cards for when you are so sick of trying to find something down below that you cave and pay $6.99 for.

Maybe Star should go into writing card messages.

MD countdown--7 hours, 45 minutes and counting....

 

[Andy]

I agree - Star should go into the card writing business. She has such a great way with words the card world needs a dose of reality.

House of Cards, you get one that says "Mom, I get a kick out of you!" Maybe tomorrow you will get a hug?

Star, what would you write for House of Cards?

 

[house of cards]

SRL and Adrianne you are too funny. I'll be thinking of the "I get a kick out of you" card tomorrow. LOL. right now he is laying on the kisses but only because he thinks it helps his Wii game, so at every break I get a kiss.

 

[SRL]

Ah, then on the inside of your card it should say "Here's a wii kiss just for you."

 

[totoro]

This is too funny... I got flowers from mother in law. She is just like your family SRL!!! Every stinking "Holiday" is a Holiday for her... luckily we are not close by yet!!! She sent flowers to me, K and N!!! It is a combo of guilt, being a martyr and being just plane "silly" is the nice word...
I feel like saying at times to her, I shouldn't have to participate, my Mom has passed away!!! All I want is a day off, alone time...
husband asked me what I want? I said, "To clean, cook listen to kids *****"
Honestly the flowers ARE beautiful but i don't want anything. Because I know I will not be alone.

 

[SRL]

Whoo, hoo, it's finally here, and in line with tradition, it's almost 4 am and I'm awake! Last year it was the cat who'd stalked down a bra in the laundry room and couldn't wait until a decent time in the morning to present it to me. This year it was my daughter who came out due to a thunderstorm.

Say, do you think if I go hide in her bed they won't find me in the morning?

Totoro, in all fairness I have to say my inlaws are nice people, but holiday flexibility isn't one of their strong suites. Ask sister in law what she'd like for MD and she'd tell you something like having her ex take the kids so she can go golfing. I'd like brunch and maybe going to a movie together.

Hey, this early wake up call means I'll be at the store nice and early to pick up the fruit and veggy trays!

 

[susiestar]

My bro showed up with a cake right after I woke up. It was nice enough a gesture, but then there was a letter in the mailbox about how I act towards him. Very interesting - and he KNOWS I can't stand nuts and of course they are in the cake (He does this with EVERY birthday cake or treat, and if I say anything, then there is a huge blowup. Drives me crazy, but I just thank him, choke down a serving, hide hte rest later and toss it. Strange way to poke at someone.)

Then husband and the kids took me out to eat. Tx Roadhouse - YUM. We went quite early because I hate when it is really crowded. thank you actually let me get THREE bites of my steak before he decided he couldn't stand it anymore. so he and I went for a walk while husband and Jess finished, packed everything up and paid. Then we went by my mom's (I gave her present to her yesterday) adn thank you wanted to stay there. So we went shopping at Walmart, wore me OUT, and now I am back in bed. Soon to be flat on my back, arg. But it was fun.

Absolutely NOTHING from WIZARD. Not sure he even acknowledges me anymore. My mom gave me a wonderful mug made by my favorite potter. Very thin and light and totally beautiful. AND she gave me a bottle of vanilla. Mmmmm cooking AND perfume!! LOL, but when I dated husband all I used for perfume was vanilla - and he always was just ape over it!

Hope y'all had nice Mom's days.

Hugs,

Susie

 

[donna723]

Mine was actually very nice. Friday I received some lovely flowers from my daughter and sister in law in S. Carolina. And she called this afternoon and we had a nice long talk.

My son had stayed somewhere else last night but called me this morning asking if I could be ready in about 45 minutes because he had made reservations for lunch at a really nice new little restaurant right down the street from me. He had overslept. When he called I was in the middle of doing laundry and had one of the dogs in the tub giving her a bath, but I got ready in time and we had a really nice lunch. We both LOVE that restaurant! It's in a little old fashioned hotel that sat empty for decades - people bought it and renovated it and filled it with beautiful antique furniture. We just have a hard time believing that they opened such a first class place in our piddly little town and they're doing really well!

 

[Wiped Out]

I'll be happy when the day is over. Long story, but the screaming and fighting between easy child and difficult child have about done me in. difficult child has been sweet at moments today. easy child, has been moody, moody, moody. No happy Mother's Day from her. I'm surprised she signed the card difficult child picked out.

Susie-TX Roadhouse-Yum-one of my favorite places.

 

[Steely]

Well, I am possibly in the worst mood ever on this grandiose day. Being a single mom of a difficult child hermit - he does not even know it is mother's day. You would think he would figure it out from the 4 million commercials, but that would take getting his head out of his pooper.

I had to work 11 hours today, while others called in sick, and left early - and I had to listen to a customer complain because their boyfriend's ex-wife was on their "membership card". As if I give a rat's behind who's name is where. Get a life.

I am seriously in a pickled mood. I came home and the house was trashed, crud everywhere - and difficult child was just oblivious.

My mom is out of town. Maybe it would be better is she were here. I feel such sorrow for not having H. today - even though I am not sure what she has to do with Mother's Day other than that we shared the same Mom.

 

[Hound dog]

My mother's day started in true difficult child form. Nichole and boyfriend drama to the hilt. (post in PE) I though, oh gee this makes me feel special. sigh At least it took place at his mother's house and not mine.

Once we got past that it was rather nice. easy child and Nichole had gotten together with the grandkid and had them make me a flower picture out of their handprints. Adorable, signed and framed. They made a similar one for mother in law. Darrin also chose to give me yellow daisies explaining to Mom that I needed them because they're my fav flower and my fav color. lol I wonder when easy child will learn to steer the boy away from the floral dept on holidays.

I picked up KFC for mother in law since she's too frail to go out to dinner and we all gathered over there. A nice pleasant visit, and as always she got a kick out of the great grands.

Then I guilted husband into dinner at Bob Evans. Yep. Guilted. I was NOT cooking on Mother's Day. Period.

And since I didn't get to eat where I really wanted....I'm treating my girls and myself to a Mother's Day meal, just the 3 of us at Olive Garden on thursday.

 

[flutterbee]

My morning started with a parade of cats on my pillow. Obviously something very interesting was going on outside and it could only be seen from my window. And of course, they decided they could only get to that window from my pillow...not from the pillow next to me. Hydro and Puddles are not little cats. And Hydro seems to stomp when he walks. So, first it's Hydro in the window with Puddles standing next to my head on the pillow. Then they trade places. Then Puddles gets down and Hydro gets up. Then Hydro gets out of the window and Abbey gets in there while Hydro is still trying to get a peek. Then Abbey does this coughing thing and, quick reflexes at work, I move cause I really didn't want a hairball on my head. Then I looked and noticed that she had managed to get her collar caught on the blinds and had it halfway across one of the parts thingy. Sigh. So I disentangle her.

I noticed a card on the pillow next to me (I guess the card was why the cats couldn't use that pillow? My head was better to step on than the card?). I picked it up and it read, "Mom", in easy child's handwriting. I smiled and went back to sleep. I didn't want to read the card until I was awake. It's been a long time since easy child has acknowledged Mother's Day, so that made me feel really good.

I got up and there was a note from easy child that he was at his girlfriend's and if I needed him to call and "P.S. I still need to make you breakfast."

An hour later, the tornado sirens started going off. When they go off, we're supposed to get an emergency broadcast message on the t.v. Well, Time Warner just updated their system and every time the tornado sirens went off (they went off at least 4 times), the cable, internet and phone went out. So, I couldn't call easy child to make sure he was ok.

After that settled down, I laid down for a nap and ended up sleeping almost 5 hours. I called easy child when I got up wondering if he was going to come home. Apparently he had while I was sleeping. He wished me Happy Mother's Day about half a dozen times and told me he loved me as many times. Last year he didn't even acknowledge the day, so it was really nice. difficult child signed the card, too, but other than that didn't acknowledge the day.

Tonight I was helping difficult child with her cooking/homework assignment and it was fun. She did get mad at me for laughing (thread on wc), but I made her come out of her room and I shared some of my cooking disasters and that made her feel better. It went downhill after that, though. easy child came home around 10:00 and isn't feeling well and went from walking in the door and giving me a hug (a rarity) to being grouchy and snappy.

Ah, well. I got a card and my son remember which is more than I've had in several years. So, I guess all in all not a bad day.

 

[tryinghard]

I had a very nice day. easy child and difficult child were both great kids today. difficult child asked me to play RISK with him. We had a very nice time.

I am going to bed very happy. I wish every day was this way....it was such a calm and pleasant day.

Happy Mothers Day to all of you WONDERFUL WARRIOR MOMS!!

I think we should have a special Mothers Day just for difficult child MOMS!!!