cherub and a few more ideas please

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by therese005us, Sep 2, 2009.

  1. therese005us

    therese005us New Member

    Today I had a meeting with the school Special Education teacher who has been appointed to come 3 hours a week to help cherub with toileting and the planning of a program.
    So, a program is being put into place that means that cherub is now going to be directed to the toilet 4 times a day, instead of around hourly.

    9.00am I am to drop her off and toilet her (school starts at 9.00am, so that means she misses out on before school play) and although I tried to politely point out that sometimes that won't be possible due to other committments, I might have to drop her at say, 8.30am, the principal politely (sort of ) refused to acknowledge this. Her answer was, we don't have a teacher aide start before 9.00am....

    Okay, next time to toilet is after first break, which would be around 11.30 am; then next, at 1.30pm; then next around 2.45pm before hometime.

    However, she can ask to go.... (unlikely)
    and also be wet so NEED to go.....

    The principal wants to change the Special Education's idea so that cherub gets to play with other children, and toilet her before the lunch break begins , that would be at 10.45am. But the Special Education says that the idea is to toilet after eating which means around 11.30 which is when the playtime is.

    The big emphasis is going to be non verbalising with cherub when she goes to the toilet - I can't see that part happening myself as she is selectively around age 3 (not 8) and just begs for attention ALL the time! So, apparently, the teacher will make a noise, and tap her watch to indicate it is toilet time. Presuming that works, cherub marches to the toilet and an aide will trail several steps behind in case she needs help.
    This teacher has put together visual cards which are stuck on the wall of the toilet separated for her, detailing every process from taking off shoes, to pulling up underpants after she's finished, washing hands process etc. I have a set for home as well.

    the aide waits outside and trusts that cherub follows the prompts all the way to cleeaning herself up. Well, I don't think that worked today, since she didn't use any of the new wet wipes I sent along!

    The principal wants to force me into giving a second contact name for the times that she is so messy she needs to be collected from school to shower (if I'm not there) and I'm wondering who would love that job! It's a bit hard being a single mum sometimes (but I couldn't see husband racing up to the school anyways).

    The watch I bought works well when we're home (today is the second day we've used it) and I'm thinking it would be handy to use at school, except it is programmed for an hourly alarm. I don't think that should be a problem, howver, because if she will willingly take herself to the bathroom hourly, then we're on the road to progress, right?

    However, tantrums will still happen and I think that's an intellect problem which I'm going to have to deal with somehow. Apparently she threw herself on the floor today and refused to budge.... I'm not sure what to do with that one.

    Maybe the psychologist can recommend something. We have our first appointment next week... do any of you think some kind of medication might help? If so, what and why?

    I'm open to suggestions please, or hugs of support!

    Bio mum today rang and said the 3yo is exhibiting similar symptoms and is refusing to do poo in the toilet..... she's already expressed her disgust at ANOTHER ONE!! I wish the dept would look at the environment in this situation and realise that is 50% or more of the problem....
  2. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    Sounds like school is being stubborn and idiotic. WHY is it better to have her go only 4 times a day and to go BEFORE lunch? The body has natural impulses to use the potty AFTER eating. Taking advantage of that seems so much smarter than doing it before eating.

    What is up with the cards to prompt her on the wall but no aide to take care of her? No way will this work, in my opinion. I cannot think of a time showing my difficult child houw to do something with cue cards worked at all, much less worked on a health issue like this.

    Is this principal really as stupid as he sounds? Keep pushing for FAPE in LRE. This INCLUDES help with potty problems. I know a few Special Education teachers/aides who change diapers on high school kids. The kids are NEVER made to feel bad. It is done matter-of-factly because it is part of their autism so the child is not made to feel terrible (on our hammock here!!

    Can you put her in pull ups or good nites or some type of underwear designed to deal with this?

    Also, be SURE the school is wiping her off with a wipe or six. If they just use wet paper towels from the si