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Child with mental illness
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<blockquote data-quote="susiestar" data-source="post: 728951" data-attributes="member: 1233"><p>No, you are COMPLETELY NOT a bad mother!!! He is still an adult and he still has to take responsibility for his actions. You have the right to have your home be a place you feel safe from his drama and problems. It is actually a very good thing to do, to draw this boundary. </p><p></p><p>Your son knows there is help available. He knows you love him and will help him if he will accept it. You cannot force it on him. Unless he is a danger to himself or others, even the police cannot force him to go get help. Maybe they arrested him because he refused to go to the hospital. Or maybe they were not trained in how to handle mental illness.</p><p></p><p>Why not go and talk to the Chief of Police or Sheriff in charge where you live. Ask what training the officers have in handling the mentally ill. Ask what why they took your son to jail instead of the hospital. Sadly, there may not be a facility to take him, or maybe there was not an empty bed when your son had a breakdown. Or there may have been some other reason. Did you know that the largest provider of mental healthcare in the US is the jail/prison system? It is NOT the hospital system! Why? They closed many if not most of the psychiatric hospitals years ago and then they took what little funding they had left and cut it to nothing. The mentally ill often end up in jail. </p><p></p><p>Some cities and counties have specially trained officers who handle the mentally ill. I am very lucky because all of the officers in my city are trained to deal with the typical mental illnesses. We also have officers who specialize in handling those people who are severely mentally ill and having a crisis. There is usually an officer on duty and another on call of these highly trained specialists. Ask your Chief of Police what training your officers have in dealing with the mentally ill. Call NAMI (the National Alliance for the Mentally Ill) and get information from them about how to handle a situation like the one with your son. They may have information that could help.</p><p></p><p>You cannot force anything on your son. All you can do is to keep yourself healthy and sane. You didn't cause his illness, you cannot cure it and you cannot control how he handles it. And that is super frustrating. NAMI runs support groups all over the country for the families of people with bipolar. You might consider going to one or more of these meetings. You can probably find a local meeting by looking up NAMI online.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="susiestar, post: 728951, member: 1233"] No, you are COMPLETELY NOT a bad mother!!! He is still an adult and he still has to take responsibility for his actions. You have the right to have your home be a place you feel safe from his drama and problems. It is actually a very good thing to do, to draw this boundary. Your son knows there is help available. He knows you love him and will help him if he will accept it. You cannot force it on him. Unless he is a danger to himself or others, even the police cannot force him to go get help. Maybe they arrested him because he refused to go to the hospital. Or maybe they were not trained in how to handle mental illness. Why not go and talk to the Chief of Police or Sheriff in charge where you live. Ask what training the officers have in handling the mentally ill. Ask what why they took your son to jail instead of the hospital. Sadly, there may not be a facility to take him, or maybe there was not an empty bed when your son had a breakdown. Or there may have been some other reason. Did you know that the largest provider of mental healthcare in the US is the jail/prison system? It is NOT the hospital system! Why? They closed many if not most of the psychiatric hospitals years ago and then they took what little funding they had left and cut it to nothing. The mentally ill often end up in jail. Some cities and counties have specially trained officers who handle the mentally ill. I am very lucky because all of the officers in my city are trained to deal with the typical mental illnesses. We also have officers who specialize in handling those people who are severely mentally ill and having a crisis. There is usually an officer on duty and another on call of these highly trained specialists. Ask your Chief of Police what training your officers have in dealing with the mentally ill. Call NAMI (the National Alliance for the Mentally Ill) and get information from them about how to handle a situation like the one with your son. They may have information that could help. You cannot force anything on your son. All you can do is to keep yourself healthy and sane. You didn't cause his illness, you cannot cure it and you cannot control how he handles it. And that is super frustrating. NAMI runs support groups all over the country for the families of people with bipolar. You might consider going to one or more of these meetings. You can probably find a local meeting by looking up NAMI online. [/QUOTE]
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