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Parent Emeritus
Choosing to be homeless
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<blockquote data-quote="AppleCori" data-source="post: 728917" data-attributes="member: 16024"><p>Hi and welcome, CR</p><p></p><p>They are definitely living an addict’s dream—having someone else pay their living expenses so that they can take drugs and enjoy themselves. All our difficult young adults would love that set-up.</p><p></p><p>My step-son has managed to get his mom to, yet again, support him. He quit his very good job because they were going to drug test him, and he is now “going back to school” on her dime. She will get tired of it, sooner or later.</p><p></p><p>It sounds like your daughter and son-in-law have some means of making money at this time. That’s a good thing. This is a good time to grant them their freedom.</p><p></p><p>The problem with giving deadlines or ultimatums is that, our difficult young adults almost always choose to do nothing and call our bluff when the time is up. You must be willing to follow through.</p><p></p><p>If you feel you need counseling, get some for yourself. Many of us do.</p><p></p><p>Dont wait too long to get started, though. It only gets harder, the older they get and the longer they have been dependent on us. Your 51 year old brother is case inpoint of that. They lose their self-confidence and grow more entitled the longer they stay dependent on someone else.</p><p></p><p>Stay with us and keep posting.</p><p></p><p>Apple</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="AppleCori, post: 728917, member: 16024"] Hi and welcome, CR They are definitely living an addict’s dream—having someone else pay their living expenses so that they can take drugs and enjoy themselves. All our difficult young adults would love that set-up. My step-son has managed to get his mom to, yet again, support him. He quit his very good job because they were going to drug test him, and he is now “going back to school” on her dime. She will get tired of it, sooner or later. It sounds like your daughter and son-in-law have some means of making money at this time. That’s a good thing. This is a good time to grant them their freedom. The problem with giving deadlines or ultimatums is that, our difficult young adults almost always choose to do nothing and call our bluff when the time is up. You must be willing to follow through. If you feel you need counseling, get some for yourself. Many of us do. Dont wait too long to get started, though. It only gets harder, the older they get and the longer they have been dependent on us. Your 51 year old brother is case inpoint of that. They lose their self-confidence and grow more entitled the longer they stay dependent on someone else. Stay with us and keep posting. Apple [/QUOTE]
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