So I thought I had been doing better. Husband has made a big effort since I first started posting last month. They adjusted medications and other stuff, and surgery being scheduled. I've been to a couple appointments with tk and even though they didn't tell me much, it's proactive at least something is being done. I've tried to take control of my life and my house, we've been making weekend outings when it isn't snowing. I've been doing better I have. But the small "stressy" tk behavior has been getting to me. It's also been getting more frequent. Aka my pj post in general parenting, blue hair, washing hair battles, sneaking stuff to her room going through drawers and suit cases and a thousand cubby holes a day where she is hiding things she shouldn't have. Throwing trash all over the floor. These are all very small things and for most of them I am maintaining a calm level tone and stating "pick it up" "do it again" "go to bed" but it's so wearing. The more effort I make for her the more of this "small awful" behavior. God knows the small awful is better than the big awful. My question is how do you keep it all in perspective? And stop letting it control my outlook? And express love? When I still want to weep with weariness. It's like someone is following you around and picking your good mood to shreds! My hair is falling out and I'm pretty sure my better outlook has just been me swallowing my anger.