Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
complete meltdown today
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="Marguerite" data-source="post: 36637" data-attributes="member: 1991"><p>I do think in this case, the punishment has to stand. You can't go back on it now. Besides, this was with a warning and is a serious repeat offence.</p><p></p><p>And most important of all, it seems to be working.</p><p></p><p>For future games, I would simply try stopping the game and remind him of how he didn't like being grounded last time. Try for an apology, and ask HIM how he would like the problem handled. ie before the next game with both boys and husband, get husband to ask difficult child 2 what punishment would be appropriate if he upsets his brother and starts screaming at him again. This gives difficult child 2 more control where he needs it and where it's no skin off your nose, which may also help him use that control on himself.</p><p>Also, don't automatically use what difficult child 2 suggests - chances are he'll be too optimistic and set an unrealistically severe punishment ("Cut out my tongue if I say anything nasty to my brother."). Negotiate it with him ("no, that's a bit harsh - how about if you upset him, you have to apologise to him and give him a hug?"), but make sure he accepts the final choice completely.</p><p></p><p>Marg</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Marguerite, post: 36637, member: 1991"] I do think in this case, the punishment has to stand. You can't go back on it now. Besides, this was with a warning and is a serious repeat offence. And most important of all, it seems to be working. For future games, I would simply try stopping the game and remind him of how he didn't like being grounded last time. Try for an apology, and ask HIM how he would like the problem handled. ie before the next game with both boys and husband, get husband to ask difficult child 2 what punishment would be appropriate if he upsets his brother and starts screaming at him again. This gives difficult child 2 more control where he needs it and where it's no skin off your nose, which may also help him use that control on himself. Also, don't automatically use what difficult child 2 suggests - chances are he'll be too optimistic and set an unrealistically severe punishment ("Cut out my tongue if I say anything nasty to my brother."). Negotiate it with him ("no, that's a bit harsh - how about if you upset him, you have to apologise to him and give him a hug?"), but make sure he accepts the final choice completely. Marg [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
complete meltdown today
Top