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Concerned about 5 year old
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<blockquote data-quote="TerriH" data-source="post: 758954" data-attributes="member: 298"><p>Heather, my own son is on the Autistic spectrum, so I thought that I would share what helped my son.</p><p></p><p>Basically, my son would try to be perfect but NOBODY can be perfect, and that goes double for the little ones. So, when he could no longer be perfect he would lose it, cry, yell, and generally act out. Whenever e would blow up for no reason it would be because he had been trying to be too good. I learned to give him a break while he was still being good. It worked better that way. HE simply could not pick up his toys for as long at a time as most toddlers, and when he was finished eating he needed to be able to excuse himself from the table and leave. Etc</p><p></p><p>I also changed his punishment for when he was naughty to time spent in the corner, and when he was five years old 90 seconds was enough. It was hard for him to stay still and so I stayed with him until I had counted 90 seconds out loud. And I was not surprised when he was diagnosed with hyperactivity when he was older.</p><p></p><p>Active punishments resulted in him acting out, but his standing in the corner did not. So that was what we did. And if he refused I simply picked him up and set him there with no fuss or scolding.</p><p></p><p>He also had great difficulty if he was in too large of a group: I learned to watch for signs that he was getting overstimulated</p><p></p><p>All in all, I do not believe that he ended up getting into much more trouble than other kids did: I just needed to keep in mind that the ideal behavior for my son was to NOT be overly good. And as he grew up we had some interesting conversations about the subject as well, as it is a difficult concept for a child that he was to leave a mess if it was too hard to pick up. It was even HARDER to convince him to come back and pick up after a break, because then he would be doing something else, but we muddled through.</p><p></p><p>He is 26 now, and living in a section 8 apartment. He did try a couple of jobs but he could not hold them, as he would get diarrhea when he was stressed, and then his supervisor would be unhappy with the bathroom breaks, which would make more diarrhea.... We discussed this with his doctor and he was given something for it, but this is not a problem that has been solved. But he is a good kid and I am proud of him</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="TerriH, post: 758954, member: 298"] Heather, my own son is on the Autistic spectrum, so I thought that I would share what helped my son. Basically, my son would try to be perfect but NOBODY can be perfect, and that goes double for the little ones. So, when he could no longer be perfect he would lose it, cry, yell, and generally act out. Whenever e would blow up for no reason it would be because he had been trying to be too good. I learned to give him a break while he was still being good. It worked better that way. HE simply could not pick up his toys for as long at a time as most toddlers, and when he was finished eating he needed to be able to excuse himself from the table and leave. Etc I also changed his punishment for when he was naughty to time spent in the corner, and when he was five years old 90 seconds was enough. It was hard for him to stay still and so I stayed with him until I had counted 90 seconds out loud. And I was not surprised when he was diagnosed with hyperactivity when he was older. Active punishments resulted in him acting out, but his standing in the corner did not. So that was what we did. And if he refused I simply picked him up and set him there with no fuss or scolding. He also had great difficulty if he was in too large of a group: I learned to watch for signs that he was getting overstimulated All in all, I do not believe that he ended up getting into much more trouble than other kids did: I just needed to keep in mind that the ideal behavior for my son was to NOT be overly good. And as he grew up we had some interesting conversations about the subject as well, as it is a difficult concept for a child that he was to leave a mess if it was too hard to pick up. It was even HARDER to convince him to come back and pick up after a break, because then he would be doing something else, but we muddled through. He is 26 now, and living in a section 8 apartment. He did try a couple of jobs but he could not hold them, as he would get diarrhea when he was stressed, and then his supervisor would be unhappy with the bathroom breaks, which would make more diarrhea.... We discussed this with his doctor and he was given something for it, but this is not a problem that has been solved. But he is a good kid and I am proud of him [/QUOTE]
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