WorriedFriend
New Member
I met my friend, we'll call her Kim...not her real name, a little over a year ago, right after her husband had passed. I learned that Kim had a grown son in his 30's who has been on drugs since his teen years. He is married and has a young child. His wife is also on drugs. Kim's son has been in and out of jail/prison so many times! Kim bails him out every time, she NEVER allows him to suffer any consciences of his actions and he just keeps getting in trouble time, after time, after time. She has opened her home to him at least 4 times that I know about because he is getting out of jail or prison and has nowhere to live because he claims he has changed and does not want to go back to his wife because she is the main reason he stays in trouble...according to him. He takes NO responsibility for his actions. Last time he lived with her, upon getting out of prison, Kim spent over $10,000 on him!!! No joke!! She is on a fixed income and had to take from her retirement to keep him up. He was only there 6 weeks before he was mad about some of her rules and he did what he always does, went back to his wife which he swears EVERY TIME he will not do. Fast forward to just a few months ago...he is back in jail on some serious charges, which he swears he didn't do. His wife has falsely accused him. Remember, nothing is his fault. He lies to Kim constantly, he manipulates her to her detriment. He tells her his lawyer says he can and will get him out of jail (another lie) and convinces his mother to let him live with her when he gets out because he has changed this time, although there is no evidence of change. He even wrote to Kim's step-mom who's daughter just passed away ( a month ago) from drug and alcohol abuse and played on her emotions to the point that he convinced her to convince his Grandfather to buy the deceased daughters truck from her children and GIVE it to him upon his release! This boy has been GIVEN 4 vehicles in his life! He has trashed everyone of them. I wish I had time to share the whole story of the lies, deception, manipulation, and utter control he has over Kim, but time will not allow. She and I got in a heated discussion over him. I was very harsh, but I was very truthful too. Needless to say, he did not get out of jail, in fact he was sentenced to prison. Kim has not spoken to me in 3 weeks, we used to talk everyday. We were best friends! I sacrificed so much to try to help her since her husband passed but it seems as though it was all in vain. I believe that it's not that Kim can't see what is going on and how her son treats her, it's that she refuses to see. Her health is not good and she is still heartbroken over the sudden loss of her husband. She can't even grieve properly because her son keeps her so upset and busy doing his dirty work all the time. She even gives him money to spend every week in jail/prison. She pays for all of his collect calls. She can't even hardly afford to take care of herself!! Any advise for a friend who is concerned over the health and well-being of her friend? He is literally killing her a little everyday and she is letting him. So sad.