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General Parenting
Consequences for my difficult child who doesnt' care?
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<blockquote data-quote="flutterbee" data-source="post: 42300"><p>I would lower the tv reward back down to 5 pieces. That was something your difficult child could accomplish and he may feel like trying to earn 10 is overwhelming and a lot of difficult child's shut down when they are feeling overwhelmed. The thinking might be, I'm never going to be able to earn 10 pieces so why bother at all.</p><p></p><p>One trick we use here for housework (because difficult child would rather lose her right arm than have to clean): Write the chores individually on a pieces of paper, fold them up and put them in a bowl. So one slip of paper would read, empty the trash cans and another would read, load the dishwasher, etc. We each draw from the bowl, set a timer for 5 minutes and work on that chore. Once the timer goes off, stop what you are working on. If the chore has been completed, throw the paper away. If it's not been completed, it goes back in the bowl and we all draw again. It makes it into a game and noone is doing any one chore that they hate for very long. It also feels like more of a team effort. difficult child loves it when we do this and we all end up having a good time. Also, my difficult child seems to have trouble putting dishes in the sink or dishwasher, so I bought paper plates for her to use for snacks. She seems to be able to get it into the garbage better than getting a dish into the sink. Don't ask me why. lol It just works.</p><p></p><p>As for the homework, kids with ADHD generally have trouble with organization. Does he have an IEP in place at school? Even if he doesn't, I would talk to the teacher for some back up support on this. Request the teacher ask your son directly for his homework rather than just having him turn it in with the rest of the class. Maybe the teacher can check his agenda (all students in our school district are given an agenda to keep track of homework and they are all checked by the teacher's until high school) to make sure he's recorded homework assignments and can check in with him to make sure he's bringing the work home to be completed.</p><p></p><p>It's a lot of trial and error. We have to get creative with our kids. Hang in there.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="flutterbee, post: 42300"] I would lower the tv reward back down to 5 pieces. That was something your difficult child could accomplish and he may feel like trying to earn 10 is overwhelming and a lot of difficult child's shut down when they are feeling overwhelmed. The thinking might be, I'm never going to be able to earn 10 pieces so why bother at all. One trick we use here for housework (because difficult child would rather lose her right arm than have to clean): Write the chores individually on a pieces of paper, fold them up and put them in a bowl. So one slip of paper would read, empty the trash cans and another would read, load the dishwasher, etc. We each draw from the bowl, set a timer for 5 minutes and work on that chore. Once the timer goes off, stop what you are working on. If the chore has been completed, throw the paper away. If it's not been completed, it goes back in the bowl and we all draw again. It makes it into a game and noone is doing any one chore that they hate for very long. It also feels like more of a team effort. difficult child loves it when we do this and we all end up having a good time. Also, my difficult child seems to have trouble putting dishes in the sink or dishwasher, so I bought paper plates for her to use for snacks. She seems to be able to get it into the garbage better than getting a dish into the sink. Don't ask me why. lol It just works. As for the homework, kids with ADHD generally have trouble with organization. Does he have an IEP in place at school? Even if he doesn't, I would talk to the teacher for some back up support on this. Request the teacher ask your son directly for his homework rather than just having him turn it in with the rest of the class. Maybe the teacher can check his agenda (all students in our school district are given an agenda to keep track of homework and they are all checked by the teacher's until high school) to make sure he's recorded homework assignments and can check in with him to make sure he's bringing the work home to be completed. It's a lot of trial and error. We have to get creative with our kids. Hang in there. [/QUOTE]
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